Friday, July 07, 2006

No more drama

While at work Thursday I had plenty of time to ponder certain things. That's what they do, pay me to ponder. Not a bad gig I suppose.

I had plopped my fat butt on the nice comfy sofa there and let my mind wander, which in that place it is a good thing to do just so you know your mind is functioning.

But anyway, back to my story, I was thinking about certain things. For example: when is the first human ever born , here on Earth, and how do I find out the date of birth?

when was the universe born? How do we know? And how big is it really?

how do astronauts poo and piddle? I mean without it flying over the spaceship and randomly into their RTEM..(ready to eat meals)

how do worms grow a new half if I cut one half off?

how do bees know how to make a honeycomb?

how do fax machines work?

see what I mean? Total and udder nonsense.

If you have the answer to any of these let me know..And don't tell me Adam was the first man, because there were caveman and shit way before that people..There were humans on Earth at least a few hundred thousand years ago...I mean I don't have the fossils or bodies, but it is scientifically proven I do believe. But of course, correct me if I am wrong, and I will still tell you your wrong. So there.

I have my job interview for the Corrections Officer Friday morning. I am almost sure I will not get it, but it is nice just to get an interview and to be considered. And I would love to make this kind of money, but I just don't have this kind of luck, so I am not holding my breath. Or I would die, you cant live without breathing, I am sure of that one.

But I would love to have my own billyclubs, hand cuffs, taser, and the proper technique for frisking people, did I say hand cuffs already?...I cant wait to do my first pat down..Finally my sailor mouth and bossy ways may pay off. This could be my dream job. Oh and if I get a badge, I may just die and go to heaven...

I mean my nice warm spot in hell, that has the dry kinda heat cause I don't much care for having sticky skin, but I will deal with the humid air if I must..I am game for pretty much anything at this point.

Have a good weekend. I am getting paid to ponder all weekend. I may come up with some real doozies by Monday, you better get your thinking caps on.

Bee Real

23 comments:

jsull28fl@yahoo said...

Well the Adam thing I won't debate because it can't be proven any more than the Darwin thing, but I sure hope I didn't come from an ape!!!!
The fax machine question is a good one, I surely ain't smart enough to finger that out. C.B. radios worry me more than faxes though. How does it go though the air and hit my antenna and comeout of the speaker and still be in the proper order?
I mean how can someone say Hi how are you?
and it never ever come out you how hi are?
odd i tell you
very odd
a figurin fool
jsull31@hotmail

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

ok,u bring up some good points here..I like your thinking..

Fantastagirl said...

The space thingy - they pee/poo in a vacuum... seriously...(didn't you see Space Camp?)

The CB thing it's FM man - FM... no worries... we learned about this in physics...but I didn't really pay attention - I could ask the hubby - he's a ham.

My question....why when I am making peanut butter and jelly sandwhiches and I drop the jelly side - why does it always land jelly side down?

SEE - that is an important need to know type thing.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

fanstagirl,
hmm, u make a good point on the pb and j thing...

and i just looked up on NASA website that they tape a bag to theier bunghole and poo in a baggie, then freeze it and then they annylize it when they come back..how gross is that?...

novaks8 said...

Gosh I hope you get it!

How interesting and exciting!

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

mary,
thank you..just think of the stories i would have!!!

Badoozie said...

guesh what shweetie, it's scientifically proven that creation is more possible than evolution, or big bangs and stuff. sorry to burst your bubble, you thought i was an utter airhead.

Choppzs said...

Ok, I just saw on some show on the discovery channel that they have these straps that they put across themselves so they don't float around while they poopoo and peepee. But how they kept the doodoo in the john was not said. But what you said was really gross, so I now know I do not want to go to space!! lol

And here's a question for you. If Adam and Eve were the first people created and then they had kids, does that mean all their kids and those kid's kids had sex with each other in order to pro-create? Ewww, that means sisters and brothers all screwed each other and we are all technically related then?? Sorry, just a thought, and everyone kind of avoids the whole incest thing when it comes to the bible and God and stuff!! lol

Karin said...

The jelly side lands down because it is heavier then the plain side. Why do we park in a driveway and drive on a parkway? Why are men incapable of seeing what is right in front of their face, but a woman can't miss it? Who saw a big mean cactus and decided to try to drink it's juices? Well I could go on and on my mind wanders like that.

Kelly said...

Regarding the job interview...ONLY POSITIVE THOUGHTS!! :)

Jennifer said...

Interesting thoughts, just found your blog...love it!

LZ Blogger said...

I have the answers to ALL of your questions right here... oh NO... where did I put that answer sheet now? ~ jb///

d said...

I don't know Bossy - that job seems kind of dangerous. Can't you just buy your own handcuffs?

As to your questions - I don't like to think about that kind of stuff too much - it just drives me nuts. If there is something that is for sure, scientifically proven - well great, I can read about it and learn. But when it's stuff that has some sort of religious spin or depends on belief - well there you lost me.

Hope you had a great holiday. Sorry I went AWOL again - just when you came back too! Gonna go read this weeks post now.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

suzie,
who told you that?..i wanna know..I dont belive a word of it;)

choppz,
i heard that too..its enough to make me not have any deisre to see the moon..i coud hold it while iw as up tehre, but it would be one hell of a loaded bathroom when i got back..

karin,
gee wiz, your a smarty pants..i have thought the same thing about the drive way..and also why do they say "slow up" when they want you to slow down?..

Kelly,
well it hink it went good..i had them sheriff bastatrds rolling on the floor with laughter..i always can find a joke to crack..they may call me for thier next event so i can entertain them..but we will see..haha


jennifer,
WELCOME..and thank you for stopping by, please come agian..

lz blogger,
oh great..cant trust you can I? geesh..

d,
you know i like to live on the dangerous side..

Gette said...

Now really, Bossy, you've been a parent for how long and you don't know these answers?


when was the universe born? A long time ago.
How do we know? Because its older than me
And how big is it really?
Really big. Now leave me alone

how do astronauts poo and piddle? I mean without it flying over the spaceship and randomly into their RTEM..(ready to eat meals)
Go ask your dad, he's the space geek.

how do worms grow a new half if I cut one half off? Just like you grow a scab.

how do bees know how to make a honeycomb? How do you know how to breathe. Same thing.


how do fax machines work?
BECAUSE I SAID SO!
Now fetch mommy a beer and an aspirin. Dang kids and their questions.

Jennifer said...

Now that's what I call thinking! i have not idea and any of it. But thanks for getting my mind in a tizzy!

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

Gette,

DAMN WOMAN:)

Jennifer,
lets put our thinking caps on now;)

Krystal said...

I have no questions to ponder. My brain is just dead.

Krystal said...

Because I somehow closed the window and am now too lazy to go back to find the post...

I told my boys that if they didn't start getting the piss into the toilet that I was going to lock all of the bathrooms and make them ask me to unlock them on an as needed basis. Then I was going to stand there and make them piss sitting down on the toilet like girls.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

krystal,
that is a good idea..I did make my son tell me every time he had to pee and i followed him in all day one day...

but i think i have him broke of this nasty habit now..I better anyway..

jsull28fl@yahoo said...

Well study this. Surely if we can send folks to space then we can make a toilet with its own gravety. I mean Id hate to ditting there and my poop float up. but it would look like we make one that had its own gravety feild that drew the stuff down in there. I also Agree with Suzi about creation being as proveable as the big bang, and though my bride would surely attest to me being no more domesticated than an ape, and maybe not that much there is absolutely no proof for evolution. Hell it would look like cats would be able to open the cabnet get the food, open and eat it on their own by now if they could evolve!
js

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

JS,
I like you:)

Badoozie said...

no one told me that, i learnt it from reading, and researching

ever heard of the seires "Back to Genesis"???? it is awesome. you got questions, they answer them nicely, it is available online, ebay, you can get it on tape for cheap. listen to it, and then come back and tell me if you still think the way you do. i challenge you and everyone else who is unsure, or whatever, to listen to these scientists and Ph.d's and then and only then make up your mind. must investigate all sides of issues before coming to conclusions, thats my motto