Sunday, March 18, 2007

Turn me loose

As I thought, at some point during The Boy's birthday he would indeed blame me for the failing of the ozone layer, the extinction of the Dodo bird, and poverty in Africa.

I am not sure how I do it, it is a gift I am assuming. A gift of making anyone I come in contact with feel as though they are about to fall into a deep depression and die.

thank you, I will be here all week.

I keep telling him, I am no Oprah, I cant build him a better life, like she can build schools. Because I suck that way..Unlike Oprah, I like watching people suffer.

We went bowling with him and his Friends, we came home, we ate cake, I ate nachos with bean-less chili and Velveeta. I am a Velveeta whore. Something about that block of grease laden goodness makes me weak in the ole knees.

I mean, whom ever invented this block of cheese u don't have to refrigerate until u open it, is a Go*damn genius.

Here are some photos of the day...

This is me, Boo and the boy....


















This is just me and the Boy...



















me and him yet again..




















I am convinced he can not take any photo without looking like a damn retard.

**
Here he is using his hot air to blow out the fire sticks...Don't ask me why there is a pencil on the table, I am dumbfounded at this discovery








*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*

This is the fu*king cake with NO leprechauns..I asked for Leprechauns u assholes..
I am definitely leprechaun-less , and I so wanted a damn holiday cake..sonsabitches



*!*!*@
*
*
*
This is me and Boo...Mr Shaky was out pumping gas...he is good at doing anything that involves the expulsion of gas..




*
*
*
*

The boy and some of his buddies.






*
*
*
*
*
*

This is Mr Shaky helping the females bowl...not me...I can fu*k up bowling all on my own, without the help of any man.




*
*
*


This is just Boo....She wants the pink ball damn it....give her the damn pink ball and all is well..even if the bitch weighs 15 pounds.








***************


The fellas....Not sure what they are doing..someone just grab a damn ball and start throwing it..please for the love of God.

*
*
*
*
*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yes, so there is your brief synopsis of how it went..
i started out messing up his whole day because holy shit, I told him he cant ride his new bike at 8am in the 25 degree weather with no coat on..
I am a total screw up...I don't know what I am thinking, kids, on their birthday's are not suppose to listen to any rules, because holy mother of God, they were born on this day..
I am making mental notes to myself...The Boy next year for his birthday, gets nothing..
Not only will he get nothing, but I will buy myself shit...and open it in front of him.
I just hope when he is in therapy in a few years, that he tells her/him, that I wanted him to wear a coat because it is still technically winter for at least another few damn days..sonofabitch that mother nataure
Holy crap.
bee happy

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

dammit Bossy
i have told u 1000000000000 times if ud blog naked it would work!

if u vomited a child itd be Butch it appears
although all ur chitlens look like u
i think u can pick the daddy
i mean i kn ow u had a lottery to see who paid for em but u really could choose whoever u wanted cause they all look like u
anyway
happy SPD and HBBD
nd there is no need to say the F-word so much..........
and in this post you refered to God, as a democrat I will have to ask you to explain this God thing???
Is it like Darwin or Al Gore?
Please educate me!
hehe
ole always right j

PinkCat said...

Looks like you all had a fab time. I don't know why boys taking such dodgy pics. I mean Sam always looks like a dork. lol

Take care xx

Karin said...

Bossy I am sorry to always have to explain everything to you but the reason boys at this age always look like such goobers is part of evolution. You see technically they may be able to mate and by making them look wholely retarded it assures that there is no one willing to mate with them. Therefore you need not worry about a wallet yet.

As far as the pink ball goes of course that is the one she wants and it doesn't matter how much it weighs cause she isn't going to carry it no matter what. You carry it to the front and then she lays on her belly and pushes the damn thing.

The jacket thing you are never going to win because he will never give you the satisfaction of knowing you are right no matter how cold he is. He would rather freeze to death than admit that his stupid Mom could be right.

Peggy said...

Look at the bright side. You don't have to do it again for a whole year. Hey at least it was a St. Paddy Cake. what ya going to do when he wants a boobie cake???? LOL

Ju said...

LOL your stories always gets me laughing. I LOVE velvetta cheese myself. I can just sit there and eat that with crackers all day long!

eyes_only4him said...

Ju,
what is it about Velveeta that I would give my first born to conserve it?

Pat said...

Nice of you to visit and thank you for comments. I had tried to visit you earlier but got an old blog. As you are the leading sister my money is on you - not that I'm sexist or anything. Go girl!

Wendy said...

Mine hasn't started blaming me for everything yet but I sure as shit blamed my mom for everything that ever happened to me. She was scared to come to the hospital while I was having my son for fear I'd blame that on her too!

Bare said...

I knew you to blame for the extinction of the dodo! I just knew it! *LOL*'

Ok, seriously, I'm sure the party was a great one! Shit, you know, nothing ever goes right for us, why should holidays be any different-- although, it did look like everyone had a great time!

eyes_only4him said...

PI,
thanks for stopping in to, and yes, may they best female win..hehe

Wendy,
just wait, the day your kids starts blaming u for everything is coming, u just wait.

Miss 1999
well his birthday party didnt go to bad, other thn he was a little bastard..haha

Raggedy said...

It looks like y'all had a blast!
Happy Birthday to "The Boy"!
The pictures were great!
Thanks.
Huggles and Love,
Raggedy

Anonymous said...

i kno i kno i get this one and the private passworded one confused sometimes!!
j

Anonymous Fat Blogger said...

mmmm....velveeta....mmmm....cake....

So that's what I have to look forward to? Retarded pictures of my son? Damn.

Anonymous Fat Blogger said...

mmmm....velveeta....mmmm....cake....

So that's what I have to look forward to? Retarded pictures of my son? Damn.

eyes_only4him said...

Raggedy,
thanks...the cake was good anyway..haha

Slick will,
lets not get that confused again..

working mom,
yes...u just wait..

KrazyMom said...

I think we should get gifts on our kids birthdays anyway...I mean, weren't we the ones suffering through endless hours of labor on that day!?

Nice pics! Hope to see you guys over Easter!

Bella said...

I can't bowl worth a damn either. I do score well on the drinking beer part.

Unknown said...

You get the good parent award for taking them bowling. Friday nite some guy showed up at the bar with seven 14-year-olds for a bday party. They wanted to play pool. Some parents are bigger retards than your kids.

Unknown said...

Let's be honest...you did the work on his BIRTH day anyway...you should get the damn gifts.

Kendra Lynn said...

Sounds like such a pleasant day.

:)
Hope all is well.

Kendra

eyes_only4him said...

Kelly,
yes, I thought that too, but then that means our mothers would get us nothing on our birthday..haha

I dont think I am coming home now..

Ktlee,
if all these damn kids wernt with me, the beer woulda been flowing.

Gette,
the bar?..for a birthday parrty?..r u seroius???

TKW,
wouldnt that be nice, but then we would have to give our moms gidts on OUR birthdays..oh hell no

eyes_only4him said...

Kendra,
pleasant doesnt even begin to describe it:)

Cricky said...

You WON!!

Congratulations!!!!!!!!!


Your boy and my girl must have gone to the same photography training school. I have to tell her, "Ok this is gonna be a normal smile" before taking pictures so she doesn't do something weird.