Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Slang

Well I got the paint for Boo's room. I let her pick it out because I am a damn awesome parental figure. What's funny is that the color she picked was the color I wanted too...There were about 6 different shades of pink. We both picked out lollipop. Aint that sweet. So I am having Mr Shaky tape it all off, then Tuesday I am going to spend the day painting it. Boo keeps leading me over to where the paint is sitting and telling me " just paint my woom momma, come on"

Monday I was in the midst of doing something very important, when the dog was barking to come back in the house...So I yelled.."shut up u stupid dog, I will be there in minute" Do you know what my Boo did? She came to me, with hands on hips and says to me in her most stern voice.

now momma, dats not nice..Don't call people stupid, that's mean, ur a bad girl

Damnitalltohell I love this kid.

Then I told her OK, the dog is not stupid, but rather a big fat nuisance.

momma, dats not nice...U be good girl, not bad girl.

~
OK I went into the whole thing yesterday about Mr shaky looking gay. And the only reason I do not post a photo of him wearing my shit, is to only not cause myself embarrassment.

I have stated that Mr shaky and his whole entire gene pool are retards. That's no secret. But Mr shaky himself is tad "spent" if u ask me....This is him

so they say we need a gallon of water PER person a day?

This is me..

I don't know, what the hell are you talking about?

you see, during the infamous Y2K fiasco....and yes I call it a fiasco, because you know what he did? He had bought about 100 gallons of water...And I am not lying...I bet there was even more then that..Plus he had jar filled with money in our house. So we had this damn jar with about 2000 bucks in it, because he was worried about the banks failing..And he wanted enough money for getting supplies if we so needed them..Plus we had numerous first aid kits, flashlights, and enough kerosene for our heater to burn down a small village. and yes he bought a kerosine heater JUST for this event, ya no in case for some reason the electric company blew up or the gas company..Because holy crap it was winter and we would get cold...Plus I was pregnant for Blondie Bee at the time, and i wont even go into the details of that..Because holy crap u would think he was all crazy.....

All of this crap was kept in the basement.

I kept telling him this was all something a total wack job would do...And I did not want him wasting anymore money on such crap..

Oh and when the "dept of homeland security"...and I use this term loosely ,told us to put plastic on our windows..That DAY Mr shaky went out and got enough plastic to tape up all our windows..And indeed, all the windows in my house had that plastic film on them for about 6 months..Finally I could not take it anymore, when summer arrived I took them down, and holy crap he about had a breakdown..

By the time we moved here, my basement still had about 10 gallons of that water left..Mind you we moved here two years ago..

So now he is on the bandwagon of getting supplies again. I am convinced only crazy people get supplies.

As of now we have a new first aide kit..One big enough to cure a small village should they infact all get paper cuts..

a few gallons of water along with a bunch of bottled water..

and enough Flintstoines vitamins to get us thru a rough spot..not sure what purpose of the vitaimins are, but I have learend over the years, not to argue with a crazy mind..

you want to know why..

The North Koreans have this guy shitting in his pants..well depending on the day he could be shitting in my pants..

I am so tired of dealing with crazy...Good Lord..

~
And I was sadly mistaken when I said my Boo could infact wipe her own ass..She cant..I am the desginated ass wiper still. Which totally sucks, but tis better then changing the diaper with her crap stuck to her bum..

Now every time she poops she has to tell me if her poop was big or small, and as its going down the crapper she says " look momma, my poop is going down"

Why do I care? Better question why does she think that I do care?

Crazy all around me. I cant get away from it.

But one of the crazy people who lives at the crazy house I work at says to me Friday night " how old are you"

I asked her " how old do YOU think I am"

then this wonderful lady. ..who eats coffee grounds to keep the evil spirits away says

18

" u think I am 18"

yes

" nope, I am not 18"

well surly u cant be any older then 23"

your right, I surly cant..Thank you crazy lady...Now go eat your coffee grounds..


See sometimes crazy aint all bad.

Bee Real

Happy Halloween..and why is it the day BEFORE this holiday it is 72 degrees out, but on the day I have to go outside and walk around the hood the high is 34..and with the wind chill will feel like upper teens to lower 20's?...why oh why...

all this so kids can dress up like idiots and collect food from people they dont know.




editors note...whem mr shaky came home from work he brought home two more first aide kits...i crap u not.

31 comments:

js said...

haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
mr shakey britches is a wacko!!!!!!!
lmmfao @ shiting in your pants!!
haaaaaaa
get em girl!
j

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

I thought that might tickle u cracker;)

ur not having any fun yet r u?..u promised no fun till i get there.

Angie said...

LOL, you would think Mr. Shaky was raised in FL. considering his need to stockpile supplies. Alas, I would definately blame the craziness on Sandtown water....that water is something... :)

js said...

hell no no fun
now I have another reason!
Mr Shakes has skeered me and I have gathering supplies and stuff since i read the post!
no fun at all!
js

deni said...

My neurotic hubby would get along really well with Mr. Shaky Pants, we could give them duct tape and plastic and they could amuse themselves for hours.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

Angie,
well I may bring that point up to him..that since he knows how to stockpile we might as well head that way..

and yes, it must be the sandtown water, but luckily u and I escaped unscathed from the water..

Cracker,
well I hate to think of u not having fun...Dont let shaky scare ya, he is a preacher in the making for Gods sake.

deni,
oh gosh, u got a crazy one too..we need to start a support club.

js said...

nope no fun for me!
Im in morning, I can't get over your jilting me when I stopped by to getcha.
Dont be skeered of Mr. Shakes ideas?
Damn now you tell me
I have bought up all the spam in Vegas and even found a propane hot plate! Almsot bought the Vienna sausages but the brotherhood down south has affectionately nicknamed them Monkey Peters and I just can't get past the thought. And they dont taste all that good fried either.
cracker

Karin said...

Well Boo seems like she has it all figured out. I think she is going to be a teacher. I am so glad my husband isn't the bomb shelter type the last thing my house needs is more supplies. You know my roommate and I bought a bottle of tequila to prepare for y2k. WSe figured if the world went to hell in a hand basket at least we would have a good buzz. You may want to consider that in your stock piles. Good luck I hope crazy isn't contageous.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

cracker,
moneky peters?...gosh I am glad I dont eat meat most days..

ok I am knocking at your..do ya hear me?...ur not answering..u mst be in the hot tub..i will meet ya down there, i need to soak my dogs..

Karin,
that would of been my idea of stocking up for y2k, only I was nine months knocked up...

Cliff Morrow said...

Still wiping the babe. Then the new bed goes back Mom.
Bring the kids by tomorrow night and I'll give each one their own ear of corn.

Brandy said...

Ok maybe second time will be the charm. Blogger did not accept my first comment...

OMG!! He did go out and stock pile like that, did he?? We knew some people who did that.. Geez like we all were going to die at the stroke of midnite.

Is that Ducth Boy paint?? If so I am thinking I know the color.. She definitely has good taste...

I am lucky I get to stay home and pass out candy and pray my kids dont get picked up for tping...LOL Joking!!

HE DIDNT BRING HOME ANOTHER FIRST AIDE KT. You are pulling our legs..LMAO

j said...

Us VIPS have hottubs in our suites!
Its large, clothing optional. No spam or MP's allowed either!
haaaaaaaaa
wish me luck
j

Meow said...

More first aid kits ?!?!?! That's too weird !! My hubby has devised a place to escape to, in case our suburb is bombed, or something !! We all know where to go !!!
For Y2K, all we did was unplug everything from the electrical outlets, that we could (excepting the fridge and stuff). We were away, out in the bush, in the middle of nowhere, so if the world fell apart, we were safe !!!
Good luck with the bum-wiping ... what fun !!
Take care, Meow

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

Cliff,
corn cobs....what time shall we be there, we wanna be first in line buddy..

Brandy,
no, I am not pulling ur leg..I swear I cant make this stuff up..

Cracker,
trust me, ur gonna want me to have my clothes on...dang..

Meow,
hiding in the bush is a good idea..as long as the dingos dont get ya..

Kendra Lynn said...

LOL...I think its hilarious that he's stockin' up in case of trouble...but Scott does some things just like that
We have a case of water down in the basement that he instructed me NEVER TO TOUCH UNLESS WE HAVE NO WATER. Yeah...okay.
LOL
Crazy right?

Kendra

1 plus twins said...

omg that is too funny. your hubby has to be related to my girlfriend. she has her whole pantry stocked cuz of the bird flu scare!! crazy i tell you crazy!

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

Kendra,
crazy?..u betcha;)

1 plus twins,
i am glad he is not the only nut job out there;)

Claire said...

Mr Shaky, he kerazee... And boo bee is just! too! cute!

Cxx

Brandy said...

Question.. What exactly is he stocking pile for this time?? Or is it just in case stock pile??

Got my pumpkins up and posted... hehehe

keesh said...

Well, oneday, if you need all that water you may thank him...or continue to laugh at him the rest of your life :)

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

Claire,
crazy is right..

Brandy,
I said in the post the north koreans have him shitting his pants;)

Kish,
my guess is I will laugh at him the rest of my natrual born life!

Neurotic1 said...

Next Mr. Shaky will be bringing home gas masks- Boo sounds like she may already need one ;) Have fun painting and ghouling around tonight in the cold weather. I will be thinking about ya as I stroll around in the semi-decent warmth!

js said...

well its opyional.
up to ya.
u decide.
I was just splainin the rules.
Mostly the rule about spam in the hottub
haaaaaaaaaaaa
js

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

Neurotic,
Idont wanna hear about ur semi nice weather...

so is dorkus feelin better, is he gonna hit the trick or treat trial tongit?

Cracker,
well thanks for explain them rules..and spam kills, kinda like crack.

Neurotic1 said...

We just went up to Daddy's office and trick-or-treated. If he gets a good nap this afternoon we may head out for a while tonight. He seems to be holding his own today!

~Deb said...

I love the fact you got reprimanded by your kid! haha!!! Priceless! You have a 'mini me' !!!

pack of 2 said...

LOL...I knew two peeps that went crazy buying stuff. One friend spent $400 on plastic wrap for the house & one guy from work was always trying to send me home with 5 gallon jugs of water that he would fill at work. The jugs were containers that fryer oil came in...ummmm...no thanks dude!

See, crazy is all over the place:)

Shelly

dakotablueeyes said...

Happy Halloween!

Peggy said...

have mister shaky pants come here to live. William has us do the same thing. If anything ever happens just try to make it to our house. We have food stored for bad times. We use and restock but we have to keep 6 months supply of some and a years supply of others. We have TP, oil for oil lamps, first aid kits, water, you name it we got it. Between our hubbys we are set for WW3

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

sorry to neglect u all..I was painting all day...and then doing the halloween thing...and damn I mam still cold..

The Blog Whore said...

Mr. Shaky is a survialist! Someday you will thank him for the 700 bandaids and the 12 tubes of Neosporin.