Friday, October 27, 2006

When love and hate collide

well, Mr shaky in fact did not win his chili cookoff. I knew I shoulda cooked it. I only hope all those judges who had to eat 11 different chili's have some nasty gas for the next week...The kind that burns ur bum when it comes out..U know what I mean right?

Well Thursday was a day. A day that will live down in infamy here at bossys hive. Today my friends, was the day my Boo Bee did in fact use the potty all day. Yes my friends hell has froze over, and it feels good. I thought for sure I would send her to kindergarten wearing depends. But my 3 year old is coming of age. She is still a retard, don't get me wrong, but at least she can wipe her own ass now. There is a God and he is smiling down on me today.Thank u Jesus...

but the day quickly turned sour when I had to dig my 40 tampons out of my purse. It seems like I just needed them not long ago. It seems I have had a visitor in my uterus three times this month. But alas, I double checked and the last time it happened was when the in laws were here, which was a month ago...

And how do u explain to your three old the use of a tampon? She comes into the bathroom, because I have no damn privacy anymore...These kids think just because I pushed them from my loins they can join me for some quality bathroom time.. as I am getting out my needed equipment, she is asking what it is. I tell her she does not need to worry about for about 10 years. She then says..momma I treee ears ode, not ten momma"...Good lord I need to put a lock on my potty door.

While running on my treadmill last night I pulled something in my knee. Now everytime I run it hurts real bad. Man why am I getting so damn old? I am only 31 years old, why do I feel like a geriatric, arthritic , osteoporosis suffering woman everytime I get up from a seated position?..What the hell?

Oh and to top it all off my cat just tried to claw my eyes out. She can see some kind of reflection in my glassy eyeball and was trying to get it out...Why am I cursed with such beautiful, shiny eyeballs?

Ok my work here is done...

and Mr shaky better not be letting any air out tonight, if u catch my drift. Or there will be trouble...For him anyway..

bee real

42 comments:

Karin said...

Yeah Boo went peepee in the potty. That reminds me of an old Toys-r-us commercial. I am happy your days of diaper changing are coming to an end. Soon since you are falling apart and all she will be changing yours instead.

I think with all that chili you can count on Mr. Shaky exploding all night long. Lucky you.

Ps. I hate blogger and time warner cable one of them is keeping me from posting.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

Karin,
the dya mine need chaging, i will glady shoot meself;)

blogger has been a bitch, i could not even get on any blogs for two damn days..

js said...

ur 31?
damn
I thought u were way younger!
anyway
my bride tells the brood she has to poop and they don't much fool with her.
I betcha Boo doesnt fool with mr shakey shorty britches does she?
Tell the lil'est bees u have somekinda biz/warden/gaurd deal in vegas.
I promise i'll pick u up, or senda car 4 u anyway!
js

Badoozie said...

you'd best be sending in payments to the closest retirement community, poke you with a fork, you're DONE

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

cracker,
younger then 31?..r u kidding me?..
well anytime poop is mentioned in the house it is usally followed by boo bending over spreading her butt cheeks open and making vulgar noises, or someone letting me i know need to change the litter box.

yes i have on my calander..GOING TO VEGAS TO TAKE CARE OF SOME BIDNESS

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

SUIZE,
DAMN..i was not done with my commet and it posted it..

and yes I dare say I am Overdone:)

js said...

well damn I was misinformed
I was thinking you were like 22
I mean I knew you had a bunch of teeny tiny bees
some of them by me but urs all the same
but damn I really studied ur pics and I was sure u werent a minute older than 22
sigh

crack

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

crakcer,
you may be a hot cracker, but ur a damn lyen one...how old r u then?..i thought we must be around the same age, i mean i am not sayin u look old, but i mean, ur butchs daddy, and dont tell me it was a statatory illegal thing was it?..shoot..he is alsmot ten so I hope to God you over 28;)

Kristen said...

I love it! She's tree eres owed. LOL. How cute!

Peggy said...

Girl write a book! With all the crazy things going on in your life it would be a best seller or you would end up on Jerry Springer!

mist1 said...

My dad used to tell me that good curry burned both ways. I assume that it's the same with chili.

JD's Rose said...

Privacy? What is this provacy that you speak of?

Hails said...

not a chilli fan at all.

Congrats on your little girl to.

OI come and visit my blog and leave some questions. Im trying to get 100 for my 100 post!!

Thanks Bossy

Brandy said...

Yay!! for Boo!!

Sorry Mr Shaky didnt win. Tell him to use a dash of cinnamon next time. It does wonders for the chili...

Now in the case of gas... My daughter lets the go all the time and they are not noisy at all. Nope silent and deadly. I got her good when she was in 6th grade. This teacher that she had a crush on, I told him that if I was him I would put her by the door. I feed her chili tonite...ROFLMAO... That what he did falling off the stool. It was quite hilarious!!! hehehe She wont let me forget how embarrassed she was....

cracker said...

hehe
im 35
u knew that im thinkin
but wait im an old 35!
i feel much older than that!
tell the hive u'll be back in a week r so
come onnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn to vegas!!!
and just so u know im really not very hot, the camera is just kind to me
jsull28fl@yaho

Neurotic1 said...

Just so you know- those burning poops are called the screaming shites! Hooray for Boo! She a big girl now! As for the age thing- it is all down hill after 30. But think of the alternative!

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

Kristen,
she says lots of funny shit;)


Peggy,
littele do u know...just not writing ones bout this though, should I?


Mis1,
yes, I have heard that..I stay clear of it;)


Jd,
baby only a few weeks old and u already know u have no pricavy:)

\Hails,
lots of folks dot like chili, ur not alone..i will swing on by in a bit:)


Brandy,
cinnomaon huh?


Cracker,
u and mr shaky are the same age...i am on my way to vegas..or is that vegas night at the Vetrans hall I am going too?..shit i dont know..


Neurtic1,
the screaming shites huh?..God I love you..

mike said...

A true tale of woe..with the exception of the successful potty training day.

Jodes said...

no way, i am thinking of doing a potty story too, my little guy will be 3 next month and lets just say it is not going well in the potty dept. but it is totally funny. i do not have any privacy either and if I do lock the door he jiggles the knob and pounds on the door and cries. :(

Kendra Lynn said...

I look the potty door now when I go in there...Kelsey has been asking about the tampons and panty liners...how do you explain the curse of all womanhood to a three-year old?
I don't....I just push her out and lock the door.

Kendra

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

Mike,
a tail of woe in deed my friend..

Jodes,
there is enough potty matireal to go round..its funny how some of us go thru the same thigns at the same time..

Kendra,
i have a phobia of being a room that the door is locked...can u imagine how I feel when i am working at the ajil..when ALL the doors leading to the outside are locked, and can only be opend elctronically?...damn...I do hate it...

1 plus twins said...

i remember those days of no privacy in the bathroom and having to explain that stuff. it was horrible. congrats on the potty training. i sure hope your hubby didn't do the "covered wagon" on you!!!!

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

1 plus twins,
wanna hear something odd?...we dont even share a blanket..I have to have my own, becuase i have to roll it up, put part under my pillow between my legs..and there is no room for him to have any...so we have our own blankets, and it works out like a damn charm;)

Jewl said...

I haven't even really tried potty training... I am so not looking forward to it!!

Working Mom said...

I'm still waiting for the day I don't have to wipe Bug's ass! She's lazy and will "forget" unless I go with her and do it myself.

Sorry about the knee. Now you can sit around and get fat like me :)

The Kept Woman said...

Last year my girls went through this phase where they were OBSESSED with tampons and pads. They'd play with a basket of them for half an hour at a time...no toy could hold their attention for that long.

Once The Duckling asked me if she could have a tampon, I asked her what they were used for, "Your bottom." Interesting thought...Mr. Shaky might consider this as nicety to the rest of the family given the recent chili cook-off thing...

~Deb said...

Sorry to hear about the chili, and sorry to hear about those people who will suffer greatly that evening....weew! Talk about dutch ovens, aye?

Possibly solution for your knee? Take 600 mg of calcium every day. My doctor told me that my joints will feel better if I did. And it worked! I had the same problem. Try it...if you don't already do.

Have a great weekend!!!

just_tammy said...

When I feel like telling a tale on my son, I like to tell of the time he came out of my bathroom with panty liners on his feet saying 'look, I'm skating!' His cousins topped that by getting into a war using tampons as ammo. We all learned those puppies can be launched quite a ways.

Glad to hear Boo will be wearing big girl panties instead of Depends on her first day of school. Now you can spend all that diaper and Pull Up money on important things you want!

Guess I will never get the application to be your friend. Even when I beg to be your friend, you wisely run the other way! If you allowed me to be your friend, I would have sent a gas mask!

deni said...

My Boo is 16 and I still don't have private bathroom time.

If you think things are falling apart now, wait till you hit 40.

Bwaaaaaaahaaaaaaah!!

I feel like a freight train hit me between the soldier blades on this fine rainy day.

Well at least you had one good thing happen, yay for Boo using the potty!

LZ Blogger said...

If MR Shakey lets some air out tonight... you'll more than likely be getting HIS DRIFT! ~ jb///

Lisa said...

I think if Mr. Shaky ate all that chilli he will blow up if he doesn't fart. If he explodes, you'll have to clean his splattered guts off the wall. Not pretty, not pretty at all. But then again, either is the gas alternative. Glad it is you and not me!

Blazer1234 said...

Too bad Mr. Shaky didn't win. But if he would have listened to you...hasn't he learned that the woman is always right yet?

I'm waiting for the day Boo-Bear comes out of the bathroom with panty-liners stuck all over him. At least your little Boo Bee used the potty all day today. That's awesome. I'm sure it's a great relief for you, too!

Hope the knee heals soon! Guess that's what you get for being Super-I-want-to-run-a-damn-marathon-Woman

js said...

come on itll be a big ole time im sure
i'll play poker till daylight then ill get up in 2 hrs and go to work
what could be more fun than that?
js

Kelly said...

Ha ha! I'm sorry, I don't mean to laugh at you. I was so sad when I found out that I couldn't have any more little ones...but I am soooo glad to not have to deal with the whole tampons and "time of the month" thing anymore (tee hee)!!

Bumbling Bav said...

man when the tears stop flowing from laughter I may be able to type. Thanks for cracking me up!

Af is a bitch.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

I just got home from work, its after midnight...I am gonna go rest my dogs on the non stinky side of the bed...sorry i was not able to comment back today the way I usually try too..ya no, shit happens..

Love u all:)

Momma Bee said...

Congrats on the potty training! Very exciting...thanks again for stopping by my hive.

EmmaSometimes said...

omygosh, bossy, you crack me up. Blogger has been a stinker lately and I couldn't get a comment in if my life depended on it. BUT I'm here now. :o)

Good for you seeing DL!! Sweet!

Cliff Morrow said...

I've read back a couple of blogs. Did you know you're kind of like watching a soap. I've been away for a while and came back to find I haven't missed a thing. Congrats on the potty. Hope it holds.

dakotablueeyes said...

lol I have the same problems with my knee ugh all I can think is hospital scope sore knee blah. Hubs has had like 6 scopes in his life, well maybe one was an actual surgery but anyway hope the knee gets better. Sucks to get old doensn't it

novaks8 said...

I can relate!

I have NO privacy either.

I also wonder why it seems to come so quickly every month. It's not fair!

Meow said...

Too bad about the chili cook-off. Hope the judges ended up with a "burning ring of fire", if you get my drift !!
Yay for boo going potty ... what an achievement.
Have a good one.
Take care, Meow