Thursday, October 12, 2006

Oh Sheila

I am madder then a wet coon. I am madder then a lassie sittin on the bog with her knickers round her ankles realizing there is no TP...

I can not even put into words how angry I am. My emotions are vile and not blog worthy. The words I want to use right now would only be suitable for an NC-17 rating. I have even made up my own curse words. That's how mad I am.

Dear Apple....

i think u saw that one coming

I hate you. My Ipod, Sheila, will not charge. I even talked ole Mr Shaky into buying me a new cord before Friday. Being the nice lad he is, he accommodated my demands. I opened the box with glee. I ran over to my Sheila and plugged her in. Oh gosh, the battery says its charging, Sheila says she is charging..of course that is what it said before, but this is a new cord, so it MUST be charging.

Alas, it was not. My Sheila is on the verge of death, and I can not revive her. On your website you have absolutely NO good information. I am thisdamnclose to walking into one of your fancy Apple stores with a 12 gauge pellet gun. I plan I popping everyone is the ass until someone either gives me a new freaking Ipod, or fixes this one.

How can you make such an incompetent piece of electronics. Why can my son make a radio from a potato, water, and some wires....But you cant get the Ipod right? Do you have illegal immigrants working and manning your Ipod making factories? You know they don't know English right?..They probably have this thing put together half ass backwards. You suck Apple. You so suck more then any word that I can even think of. That's how bad you suck.

My blood is boiling. I am feverish. I may stroke out here. God I HATE you Apple. I hate you.

I want to forget about you Ipod. But your like crack. Crack is something that is hard to get off of. Crack is whack don't know?....

So apple this is my recommendation for you and your squirrelly company.

stop producing the ipods in mass quantity. You don't have it right yet. Maybe I should send my 9 year old son to show you how to get it to work. This boy can build anything. And he knows English. That is a plus.

Suck it Apple. Suck it hard and long....Your rotten, full of worms and make very sour pie.

Yours truly,
a very mad Bossy.


Plus other things that have my knickers in a knot....

*It snowed today
* It was cold today
*someone is going to be doing some digging in my yard, there are flags in it, and orange markers on my grass..yet nobody has told me anything..and I know their digging cuz I asked...why don't they tell me...I would like to know when, why where..asswipes..I hate asswipes.
*it snowed today
*I hate living in Minnesota
*It smells here
OK it really does not smell here, but I hate it as much as if it did
*it snowed today
*I had to keep telling Boo today that dmanit was a bad word and to stop saying it

OK, I must go now....I have nothing good to say. Like your momma always told you..

if u have nothing good to say, don't say anything at all

Apple you suck.....I am coming with a pellet gun. I hate you..

OK I better go now.

Bee Real

apple sucks!


mike said...

Amd to think an apple a day was supposed to be a good thing.

Who knew?

deni said...

So what you are really trying to tell us is that Apple sucks, right?

I just wanted to be clear.

Peggy said...

nice to see you are having a good day for a change and in such a sweet mood! LOL think I will go make some apple bread,

Blazer1234 said...

You totally need to cut and paste your blog comments onto an email and send it to apple. Maybe they'll send you ten new ones.

Apple does suck. Snow sucks too. I hope your day tomorrow isn't as sucky.

Britmum said...

Oh my Bossey I sure hope they cover their asses when you walk in.

I am sorry that you own a piece of Apple crap. Never buy a Mac, thats the moto in our house.

Take care sweetie xxx

just_tammy said...

CRAAAAP!!! So sorry to hear it didn't work out.

On top of that I was complaining to you about our chilly weather and you got snowed on.

I must do something to cheer Bossy who has been done in by a crab apple.

Carmen said...

Sorry about your new cord. I am glad that someone is having as bad a week as me. You need to come join me. I've decided to drink a beer and hopefully forget about my crappy week! And to think it is only Wednesday and my in-laws will be here tomorrow. Aargh! However, I don't have snow here- it was 75 and sunny today!

Working Mom said...

See and people make fun of my mp3 player cause it's not an ipod! Mine still works and I've had it for 5 years! And it was only $150!!

Ok, sorry, not trying to rub it in :)

It freakin' snowed?! What the hell?!

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

ok, sorry I am behind here..I have been tryig despartley to see whats wrong with shiela, i have decided to euthiniser her.

eat oranges.

yes mam, that is SUCKS all in cap letters:)

Dont you dare make apple bread, I will come to that homestead it all.

I dont thnk apple gives a rats ass i am pissed off...but I tell you what, they are gonna be sorry when I waltz into one of thier stores;)

they better do more then cover thier asses..

oh it all went down hill after i emailed you..I am so damn mad..and yes I got snow did not stick, but it did snow.

hell I need to get to your place ASAP...that is until I heard the word in-law..maybe u need to come here for a few days;)

thanks for the rub, at least i am not pregnant:)

and yes, what the hell?..snow?..damn

dakotablueeyes said...

oh that would so have me pissed off too. I don't have an apple, I have a dell dj love it

The Kept Woman said...

It fucking snowed here too.


Bossy♥'s YOU said...

well I have 2 dell computers, they are apple ipod..not so much...assholes.

amen woman...amen..what the hell? its still early fall..damn we need to move.
i have a friend who lives in florida one in texas, arizona, north carolina...which one should we go to?

Lisa said...

I guess it is too damn late for me, as far as what your mom says- because I have said (written) plenty of not nice this week. That bites about your iPod. Hate to tell you, but my iPod croaked for a while too- charged but the click wheel wouldn't work. So no volume control, no skipping song. I got pissed, put it in a drawer for a month and now the damn thing works again. It's gonna' snow here too. Sucks!

Kendra Lynn said... hasn't even snowed in Michigan yet! Although...its supposed to on Friday. :)
Sorry you are having such a rough day.
Hope it gets better. :)


aatank said...

Try hitting it with a baseball bat and see if that makes it work better, or throw it across the room. If nothing else it might make you feel better.

The snow is suppose to hit us on Thursday. Thanks a lot. You give us all of your shity weather.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

shoot I need to get over and see whats goin on with you..I so need to add u to the honeybees, becuase I forget to stop such a freakin loser.

oh it will be etter tommorwm it cant get worse can it?


well I had entertained that thought..but i have cooked up a plan to get a new one..a free one..we will see what happens..

oh and dont blame the weather on was 85 degrees here 2 damn days ago..I blame it on Nebraska.

Brandy said...

Ok Apple sucks big donkey you know what!!

So Sorry about your Shelia!! Have you sent Apple a nasty email yet. That always seems to work for my hubby!!

It SNOWED??? I want to come and live there. We didnt get no snow yet...*pouts* I love the snow!! I need to move further north. Damn!! This is so not fair!!*crys* I want some damn snow people!!! LOL

I so can help you with your project too!! Just had to add that one today!! LOL

Hope your nite gets better!!!

JUST A MOM said...

9 or 10 in 84??? You suck,,,,, I was,,,,,, 28 then.

I will be back later to read. haha

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

well where the hell do u live? me, u dont want snow.

I HATE snow, and HATE winter even more..this is why we are moving next year.

dont get me started on why I hate winter..we would be here all damn day, and no one wants that:)

well if u want snow, come here and we can work on my project together:)

oh, the snow did not was heavy flurries mostly...but it still pissed me off!

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

Just a mom,
yes..I am a young duck...I am only in my early 30's. dont hate me..hehe

go tigers..

get your ass back here and read about my freaking heartbreak:)

d said...

Rest in Peace Sheila.

Ok - you have to do something about this. Contact Apple - go to Walmart - you can return anything at Walmart and if those don't work there are other ways - we'll talk.

Having said that I'd just like to take the opportunity to say that the ipod does indeed suck donkey balls - In fact, Apple sucks all kids of farm animals balls. Basically the success of the ipod is a result of marketing genious, it is in no way a superior product.

So if thigs don't work out with Sheila, if you don't get a Sheila II - for goodness sake, don't get another damn ipod. I have a sony and I'm quite happy with it - but there are a ton of others out there.

Brandy said...

I live in Illinois. And oh yes I do want some snow. My hubby met me in Texas and I was so ready to come back north for the winters. I love the cold. I know I am a little weird that way. That sucks it didnt even stick. Oh well. I will soon get some I hope.. keeping my fingers crossed!!

But I dont think my hubby really can handle the snow.. So maybe I shouldnt be praying for it that hard.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

walmart?..r u kidding me?..they dont sell ipods do they?..I have MAJOR issues with walmart. help me out here..tell me what to do..give me a play by play list of what to do.

I am acctually calling the Apple store tommorw and raise some hell..

so does sony make thier own version of the ipod?...let me in on what u know..things are differnt there in canada..tell me damn it..tell me what to do:)

oh Ill..yes u get plenty of snow then..haha..its much colder here though, u know eveyr year so far it has gotten to 50 below..and that is without the wind factor..

God I hate here..

JUST A MOM said...

oh man I should NOT have come back to read, not only were you 9 or 10 but you got SNOW TOO!!!!!!!!!! I would kill for snow, my daughters ipod works wanta trade snow for it??

Jerry said...

It may snow flurries tonight here too. I'm not happy about that. I'm not even sure where my winter clothes are.

novaks8 said...


Holy crap.

It has not been below 45 at night here yet. (it will be tomorrow night)

Oh and the IPOD? All electronics are crap!
We bought a 5 DVD player that lasted a month.
Two X Boxes that work sometimes...Nintendo DS that won't charge up now....TWO Leapsters,both stopped working....

I think they know that we will buy duplicates so they aren't worried.

I am thinking of going Amish or something.

Jewl said...

I would like to say that I feel your pain but sorry I don't. I have no need for an Ipod thingy in my life.... I have no clue why so many people are into them. I guess I am "one of those" people...
So, it sounds like your in a really good mood... See, we would be great friends!

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

Just a mom,
yes snow..I mean it did not stick, but for a few minutes it was on my must be smpkin crack if u want snow;)

same here, its like 20 degress and i have no idea where my winter clothes are..we can be cold toghter I guess.

yuo..snow..not pretty....but its suppose to be back in the 60's tommorw, I dont get it.

and our dvd player alwyas skips...our VHS player never skipped..damn, i hate new shit.

well I sowre I would never get one..but my main sole purpose for it, is for running and working out..I need tunes;)

The Kept Woman said...

Tease not because I have no problem showing up at some stranger's door to sleep at their place so long as it's southern and warm...

Karin said...

Bossy you need to come here. It isn't even cloudy here yet and I can take you to several Apple stores and stand there until they fix Sheila. I can't guarantee it won't smell here too, but the weather is nice and we can get Sheila working.

Gette said...

Jeez, Bossy, I haven't been reading as often, and I could've saved all the pain. Send the 'pod with Shaky to the Apple store and have them swap out the battery. And return the cord. Then breathe. You change the batteries in your flashlight without cursing Duracell don't you?

And Britmum, it is SO on. Once you go Mac, you'll never go back.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

me either:)

man how I wish I could..

its not the battery, and no matter what they do I have to send it in to get fucking apple stores fucking repair ipods..oh geesh, did i say all that out loud..even fit was the batery, i have to send it, the more i say thta the more it pisses me off.

jsull said...

Well damn you should just let it all out
dont hold back
tell us how you feel

I hate the apple folks gotcher panties in a bunch
that aint good
i do recomend more fire power if you really want to get their attention though

you need me more'n ever now
your unwaivering drinkin buddy

hope your day gets mo betta

Bumbling Bav said...

You are living my SONY hell!

And what the heck is up with the friggen snow???? We are in Tshirts here... global warming... our sled dogs are outside tanning... lol.

Good luck with the pellet gun. And if that gets boring... set your kids free all cracked out on chocolate.

deni said...

Ok, just so I am clear on that.

In horror I skipped over the whole snow thing, must have been a mental block. One thing I don't miss about back home is that white crap.

Thanks for the comment on my post, at least I know I am not alone.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

come NOW bring a loaded be pretty..

so its warmer up there in ole canda then it is here..ok now i am even more ticked off!

how could u miss the snow part?..that was the worst part..haha..

and your welcome, I know how u feel, so its good knowing your not alone huh:)

js said...

ok ok
I'll bring the shooting irons and a full cooler
if we get in the cooler first then maybe you'll ferget the shooting irons!!
Its 85 or so here
fun and sun in the sunshine state

The Blog Whore said...


I was thinking about going swimming today... you coming?

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

oh hell I do need to booze up before i go, but i sure as hell dont wanna get to drunk that I dont go..

its about 23 here....ashole..haha

Blog whore,
yes, Man I only wish..I hate you too..anyone who can go swimming i hate..i need a freaking winter coat...its 23 outside right has NEVER been this cold in October in whole damn life.

js said...

well i was kinda thinkin getting hammerd would keep you outta trouble!!!

It's to hot here to swim, man you'd get sunburned quick, so hot, sheeesh, so bright.
I haveta stay in the climate control

Krystal said...

The reason Sheila no longer works and Apple sucks is that Bill Gates now owns 25% of Apple. Apple is now using many Microsoft componants.

That means that all Apple products will soon suck shit like Windows does.

Have a day.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

I wanna get drunkard, and still cause trouble..r u up for it?


Gette said...


iPastor got the battery changed on his at the MOA store while we shopped. Maybe they just know yer packin' the pellet gun.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

r u kidding me?

I called the one in ridgedale, talked to the people at apple, they both told me the same thing..

oh well..I dont wanna have to fight the traffic going to the MOA..I hate that place..

but i am really pissed.

Jamie Dawn said...

I've been a little pissy lately, and I so hoped to come here and find Bossy in a good mood.
It wasn't to be.
Sometimes if you bang on something that is broken, it starts working again. You know, like if you hit the TV and the picture straighens out. Your ipod just needs a good shaking and bashing.
Boo is learning your bad language.
A cussing toddler... what a joy! :)
You should start saying "E= mc squared" over and over again. If Boo starts saying that, people will think she's a genius!!!

Amanda said...

LOL..I come to your blog from another persons, and I must say that I laughed my ass off at this post. You sound I look forward to reading more!

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

oh man, I am sorry your having a bad day, I have been having a bad week.

I need to move south and sip something on your swing...can i come over?

thank you...its like this everyday, I a crazy, and everyone here will back me up on that..

please come again, if u dont mind a crap load of crazy:)

js said...

surely you know the answer to that!!!

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

cool beans..let get to it:)

j said...

Im all in......

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

yee Haw!

ole all in J said...

you knew that already though

and just for the record wet coons arent really very mad
wet hens r mad
wet goats r mad
but coons ummmmmmmm not so much