Thursday, September 28, 2006

Devil Inside

As I was spying out the window this morning on my daughter at the bus stop, had to make sure no one was attempting to kidnap a kid or my dog for goodness sake. I saw this. Now at what age do little girls think they are better then everyone else? At what point do they become vile humans...Well at 6 they do...Look..This is my daughter and 2 of her friends...Notice they are all clichey..My little bad ass is the one standing closest to the bike. I am not proud of this....

This is the other kids. Notice how they are seggartgated to the corner?

What the hell is that about?

Is it because they are chubby kids or that one is black? I don't know? My daughter plays with those other kids...sometimes....I just don't get it. I did not start being a bitch till at least 12...Ok maybe 10. But she is 6. And in first grade.

I don't know why this surprises me. This is the same girl who refused to talk to her teacher the day of the open house, ignored her little friend from kindergarten, and rolled her eyes at another mother for introducing her to her little lad that sits next to her.

I know the pictures are bad, but I was looking thru my kitchen window and this is thru a screen. I could not be obvious as I was spying people. Private dicks don't let it be known they are photographing you..Its common knowledge.

Well today is the day my mother in law makes her appearance. Its not that I don't like her per say...Its just that she can get on my nerves. As everyone can get on my nerves..I am weird that way.

And plus, I am not much for social gatherings. If your gonna come visit me, bring a coffee cake, some gossip and be ready to leave within 2 hours. That is my limit.

Unless you are a member of MY family, or a close friend. Then you can stay 4 hours.

I hate having to prepare meals for other people. I hate other people going thru my cupboards looking for glasses or plates. I hate them rummaging thru my fridge looking for food. I just all around hate having company..Unless your staying for a reasonable amount of time..Like a half hour.

I don't mind the family get togethers, I don't mind seeing Mr shakys family..Not that any of them make a habit of coming here, which is fine.....But anyone in general gets on my nerves after a while.

It starts to show that my annoyance level is rising as the second day approaches. I start slamming things, being mean...Not sure why they continue to stay.

again, I don't mind having company, as long as they stay only like 15 minutes tops. And bring there own damn food and drink.

Am I wrong? Should I be more accommodating? I think not. The nicer you are and the more welcoming you make your home, the longer they will stay. I have a system and it works for me.

Make them feel as uncomfortable as possible, that way they make cut the visit short by say even 10 minutes, and they will not want to come again for say another year. A full calendar year preferably.

Anyone wanna come for a visit?

I didn't think so.

this just in, out of the blue, in the middle of dinner..Boo Bee informed us all that her sisters butt was gross.

The agony which is my life consumes me.

Bee Real


just_tammy said...

Hope you have a painless visit with your dear sweet MIL! Seriously, I really do. You've been through enough lately. Sending lots of good thoughts your way!

For some reason I like you too much to torture you with phone calls since I know how much you hate them. Say something to tick me off and I'll give you a call to get even!

Karin said...

Well my family is courteous enough to stay at a hotel when they visit. The inlaws prefer to stay with us. I hate that. Then I feel constantly judge and inadequet in their eyes. Perhaps this is a running theme of my day.

I don't know when girls become bitches I just know that I am one now.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

I am hoping to be seadted for most of the 5 days..or drunk..whatever..

um, I love calls from you:)

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

Man, I dont think our familes know anything about hotles...course when the drive 20 hours tog et here, they must figure we can at least grace them with a free stay..damn people.

and I am one, too. and we should be proud..I think anyway;)

no v-jag here! said...

this should be a popular take............
i contend that being bitchy comes standard issue with a v-jag-na
whatever click they are in they are better than the others
and they are better than the rest of said click
I kno i have one
daddy hes a dork
daddy hes dumb
daddy shes a stupid head
damn girl
you v-jag-na owners are meanies

just_tammy said...

I don't remember you mentioning the visit was going to be 5 days! Yikes!
Is it just your MIL or FIL as well? Maybe I need to send something besides good thoughts your way. Don't think that will be enough! Expecting great stories though...

Don't even know what to say about the rest. Butch who is gloomy on the outside, Blondie the B, and Boo with her many deep thoughts. To top it all off you are married to a man who shakes for no known medical reason. Good thing you grew out of the retard stage so you can take care of them all.

Think I'll keep my numerous retard moments to myself. You will deny ever being my stranger friend especially since many have occurred as an 'adult'.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

cracker jack,
daddy shes a stupid head?..hehe..

my Boo calls her brother and her daddy she..whats up with that?

yes 5 days, with a possiably of 6..

you should come here to counter balance.

j said...

yeah evidently a stupid head= a dumb-ass!
i dunno
but she surely looks down on one and all!
boo says she huh?
i have a cuz who is 20 or so now and always called my aunt (said Ant) Judy, uncle judy and still does!
maybe she'll grow out of it

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

well that how I say aunt..(ant) do u say say it?..awant?

uncle judy..thats some funny crap there.

Schell said...

How true, the nicer you are, the longer they stay. I have been too nice for the last 10 years and let me just tell you it's all over now. I am convinced I will die a lonely old women, Quee Sera Sera, or however you spell it, Whatever will be will be, but it's okay as long as I have my stuff. Ha ha. Oh and my cat, or a cat at that time, yepp, crazy old cat lady, that'll be me. Don't care. Okay, enough of my rant, hope you had a good day, sounds like you had a day off, those are good days.

beth said...

well, just think of all the great stories you'll have to share with us. You might not be looking forward to the visit, but I sure am!

Blazer1234 said...

I'm with Beth...just think of all of the material you'll have for your blog. You can entertain us for months. :) You can always make excuses to get yourself out of the house. "Oh, shit...I need tampons! I'll be back in three hours. After you're asleep." That could work, right?

Lisa said...

It is obvious that you have expereince in this spying stuff.

I think girls are becoming bitches at an earlier age now. More years of practice that way before they get married and really have to use that bitchiness full force.

j said...

well im kinda funny once you get to know me i have been told!!!
he really does call her that tho!
some folks say awwwuuuunt
some say auntie
ole crack

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

I could not agree with you more..I would rahter be lonely then having in laws here:)

Well, I can pretty much gaurtee at least one good story..but really, things go really slow when they are here..we sit around and watch myth busters..

holy crap you are a damn genuois..going on a three hour tour to go tampons is pure gold..

I think your right..and its damn scarey..

these little girls barley outta diapers thinking they own the damn bus stop..oh hell no I say..

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

auntie?..oh you have got to be kiddin me..

I think I love your family cracker..

j said...

well my folks damn sure dont say auntie
we are Ant people
ud be tickled with my folks im thinkin
most are
southern folks are mo funny anyway

Peggy said...

now miss bossy since you are so smart. why is my comment for this post on another posts comments????????????

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

oh now your picking out your jeans..good are a fussy boy.

I was wondering the same thing..

Bumbling Bav said...

The day my MIL stays with me... is the day she is my EX-MIL! and her son... well he would be dead ofcourse!

As for the clicks... ya they do start at 6. Heck even at 4... for some of us bitches. My 5 yr old is nice... but my 4 yr old... I would not cross that chick for nothing. She is her click and all the little chicks know it... even her brother and his friends know it. As for my 5 yr old... she is too busy being a friggen horse to know what is going down in life!

Enjoy the visit... you brave girl.

j said...

just wanted you to be sure what to get!
i am sooooooooooooooooooooooo not product loyal too
cr4azy about the jeans
i aint even loyal to beer, boots, snuff nuttin
but jeans, its gonna be wranglers ( stranglers the chick at the bar called them!, when i was single anyway hehe)

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

So far only one of my girls is showing attitude. My 3 year is being spared.

I will sob uncontrolably if the day comes when she walks to the dark side like that.

well at least you have you standards. You wont back down..I think u should try and get a gig as the new wrangler man.

do they have a wrangler man?

i'm gigglin at me said...

well they have that guy ummmmmmmmmmmmm dale earnhart jr
but u know
they tried to get me to repn them but they were afraid I was much to good looking and could possibly disinfranchise their current customers
the curse of beauty

~Deb said...

Kids are funny when it comes to friends and making new ones. But that view from your window is a trip!

Good luck with the in laws. I hate it when people go through my fridge or anything. I feel violated!!! ha!

Crashdummie said...

Wow BB, you managed to minimize the visit hour from 4 hours, to 2 hours, to 30 minutes, 15 minutes and in the end 10 minutes...

Guess just thinking abt having guests over gives you the creepes huh? Totally understandable.

Your home is your castle and who'd like it to be invaded. If someone wanna see you, havent they heard abt resturants, bars or cafes?

Duuh! *rollz her eyez*

PS. Hmm dunno if your amazment abt ur lil' bee having lot of attitude has to do with the fact that she bet you... hmmmm hehehe

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

dale jr is ugly..your much better looking, would appeal to the lady rednecks, I will pull some strings and see if i can get ya in:)

and then having to clean up after them..i hate touching plates other people ate off of...maybe we are realted, or long lost soul mates:)

you noticed that huh?..well when it comes to the in laws, any visit may be too I right?..haha

are you saying she got her bitchyness from me?..why I outta...


Badoozie said...

you're making too big a deal out of the "group" of kids....

i love that your ideal visit went from 2 hours to 10 doofus...and if i ever come there? you'll tolerate me however long i say you will...feel it? got it? good. prepare the room

Kendra Lynn said...

I think that cliques(is that how you spell it?) form awfully early these days.
My poor Merry had a cute little friend at preschool last year...and we got together for playdates several times during the summer months. NOW, that cute little girl has a NEW friend, and many times, leaves Merry out in the cold. The new friend (I have seen this personally) has told merry several times that NO she can NOT play with them. Sigh.
I hate that. Makes me want to go to the new kid's mom and give her a piece of my mind.


Choppzs said...

I have heard about the "clique" shit from my daughter too. Just the other day she had to do a "dare" before she could be allowed to play with these girls. I talked to her about not doing anythign stupid and how she has other friends and she doesn't need to hang out with these particular girls. She said they are nice, but they only want to play with 3 girls at a time, so in order for her to be one of the 3, she had to do something. Later after school she told me they made her hang upsiddown from the monkey bars. Not bad, compared to what I thought they might have her do (streak, kiss a boy, do something to the teacher) I hate this stage, makes me sick and I told her if she ever becomes a snobby bitch she will get her ass kicked! lol

Oh and my MIL is here also. We get along great, and she is very sweet. Only thing....she babies the hubs to much, and that drives me insane!!!!!! Damn baby anyways! lol

kaliblue said...

Holy shit!!!! 5 whole days with the MIL??. You are working lots of overtime right? and then stopping on the way home to pick up a fifth of your favorite cocktail and going straight to your room to get plastered right?. that should make your visit with her interesting. *giggles*

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

you can stay 45 minutes:)

I cant stand mean kids...

too bad kids are like that.

yes mine babies the mr shaky too..lets him get away with crap I dont allow...damnitalltohell.

yes 5 whole days....they drove from Michigan...I am about ready to send them back though:)

The Kept Woman said...

I think you are not looking at this the right way...they are and the hubs should use their presence as live-in babystitters and leave each night. I mean, you will have to go back, but hell, a nice dinner out without some kid throwing food onthe floor is great.

Wait, that last part was about me, Sorry.

The Blog Whore said...

I think the bitchiness starts early. I noticed it already in my kids pre-k class.

Brandy said...

Kids do things a whole lot soon than they did back when I was that age. Its sad but that is life I guess...

I get very cranky when my family comes and I have been known to kick them out of my house, exspecially when they try to rearrange my things to their liking... hmmm maybe that is why no one comes to visit us except for at Christmas...LOL

j said...

well damn
i think i got a compliment
I'm for it and preciate it too!
See what you can work out for me
I'll give you 10 points for your agent fees
and I agree I am purtier than him, he makes a tad more loot tho

pack of 2 said...

I have that "edge" too...people just bug me! hehe:)

Good luck with the visit.


Jamie Dawn said...

Be nice to your MIL.
I am opposite of you...kind of.
Well, I like to have company over. I like to fix a nice meal and have a nice visit, but I am like you in that I like for them to leave before too long.
I love to entertain, but I don't want people staying for a LONG time. I like to have my space back.

Your daughter is being snooty. I guess she thinks she is ALL THAT and a box of chocolates.
She got that from you, you know.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

true as it may be..its do u trust them with all three of them for more then say 30 guess is very questiable:)

blog whore,
yes so very true..

yes the bug the shit outta me too..I hate it;)

crap i noicted i missed a few of you..I just took my sleeping pill and things go down hill from here..I hate to acctaully read my post for tommorw after I am out of my drugged state..i hope it even makes sence,

so sorry guys i missed, i really am turning to mush as i sit here..