Friday, February 10, 2006

Truth and lies..And being without straps

answer at the end...

So Suzie tagged me on this one....I may get this wrong but I think I need to list 4 truths and one lie..Or it could be 4 lies and one truth, I dunno I forgot, so I will just go with 4 truth and one lie, and you try and guess which is the lie..mmmkayyy?

1. In 1990 I had 2 members of New Kids on the block call me at home, at a concert I gave a roadie my phone number to give to Donnie, and 2 weeks later, I got call.

2. A girl I went to school with had a family member who was on Judge Judy 6 years ago..The girl was a teenager who had an affair with an attorney , who was married to my second cousin.

3. I once went fishing using corn flakes as bate.

4. I once ate dinner at a very pricey joint , then "went to the bathroom" and skipped out on the $250.00 bill

5. I wrecked the front end of my moms car back in 94 by running into a gas pump, but told her I have no idea how it happened..

Ok, guess what one is a lie..And yes, only ONE is a lie..Hardy har har

OK, so my future step mom has showed me the dress she is thinking about me wearing for the wedding. I am freaking out now..It is a pretty strapless number...

I told her I am kind of freaked out because I worry about the zipper busting and then having my girls make eye contact with the priest, then have him pass out, causing an uproar in the chapel. Or them "popping" out as I am bending over to adjust her train or something..I mean it could happen right?

Or have my duct tape that I will need to use to keep them in an upright position...Become loose and have my goods slopping out over top of the dress....I don't want any unfortunate accidents people..Lives are at stake here...

I have never worn a strapless dress....I have fear of the unknown...

I told her I would see if they have tent fabric as I think I may need a custom order to make sure I am fully covered..

Then she said I am crafty and I should have no trouble whipping up my own dress....This girl needs to learn to respect her elders....Jennifer, remember I am older than you Missy and I can take you over my knee little girl..


oh and my life sucks right now..We just did our taxes..We normally get back about 5,000..This year, we are getting back 155 federal and we owe the state about 2100.....I am moving to Canada cause our government sucks.....Opps did I say that out loud?

most of you guessed right, the dine and ditch is a lie....the rest were all the truth....if you need detailed explinations of the rest, let me know..:)


Karin said...

ok I am hoping the dine and ditch is the lie. Strapless can be fun. Just get it sized really well.

Peggy said...

I am with Karin. You will do fine in strapless. If the hollywood crowd can wear almost nothing and keep it in with 2 sided tape you can handle it!! LOL

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

hmm, intresting choice..
oh so I should get sized real i hope they dont grow or shrink drastcially between fittings:)

I am all about the 2 sided they sell that at Target?..hahaha

Badoozie said...

you better take another look at those taxes. that doesn't sound possible. no way hosea

the lie is the one about you dining and dashing. and you did get it backwards, its supposed to be 4 lies and one truth. not 4 truths and one lie, but WHO CARES.

your new step mom is younger than you? whoops.

you seem to have some sort of fetish about "your girls". what makes you think they are girls?

and why are you so consumed with them flopping around. you need to just have them removed, and there will be no more trouble K?

d said...

Yup, the dine and ditch is the lie.

Although I'd love to have you as a neighbour, you may want to rethink the moving to Canada idea - here they just take all their taxes off your paycheck, about half of it to be exact.

JD's Rose said...

HA! I am guessing that the gas station one is the lie. That one seems the most normal.

Go the tape. It DOES work.

Nerdine said...

I'd go with the fishing-thing as the false info - it's far too normal - I mean - everyone's done that, no?

I know what you mean whith the strapless number. I don't go there. I want my ta-ta's in private, and definitely nowhere near the priests eyes.. - or the whole congregation's eyes either come to think of it. Although they may have seen thousands ta-ta's before - they haven't seen mine. So I do straps thank you very much.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

I am afraid my taxes are has to do with us getting "income" from the house we rent out in Michigan..when we really made no mone it just covered the payment..damn goverment anyway..

Oh I know thier girls..they told me so:)

they take the taxes out of your check here too...its just the house we rent out in Michigan caused us trouble..but I am thinking Mexico is sounding better..its warmer there;)

jd rose,
I so getting the tape:)

yes, Ta ta's are meant to be viewed by the owner only, am I right?..hahaha

Kendra Lynn said...

I am guessing that the dine and ditch is the lie...and that you will find some way to contain yourself in your strapless dress. I am SUPER modest, so there is NO way I'd get caught dead in a strapless dress!!! LOL
Good luck.

Anne said...

Hmmmm...I think dine and ditch is the lie too. I hope LOL

Hey, I had Mick Brown (from Dokken) call me-and I WASN'T HOME to get the call! ARGH! I got to meet him anyway after that lol

Uh...that priest, preacher? I forget which-it may be the best day of his life if your dress slips! ;O) lol

Taxes-man, we are always seeming to owe someone so when we SHOULD get a good return, someone runs off with it :(

Mike said...

I'm always afraid the 'girls' are gonna pop out when I go

The Blog Whore said...

I'm going to say #1 is the lie. I'd think you'd want to get it out of the way and list it first. Although I was going to say the pricey dinner at first, I decided to go with #1, yup...

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

I dont consider myself modest, I like wearing tank tops and such, but I do have a fear of spillin outta my dress;)

I use to LOVE were you a groupie..hahahaha

dont taxes just suck?..why does the govermtn think they need to sqeeze us like lemons?..ugg..

i think seeing your girls may be well worth it;)

lawbrat said...

With regard to the taxes, have a second opinion. This happened to my ex and I when we were married, and we had NEVER owed before. Upon getting them done again, it was our average return, and no owing. It was a very stressful time until we did that, but glad we did.

I'm thinking the gas station one was the lie. When will you let us know?

novaks8 said...

Try actually having to PAY!

Self employed fun I tell ya.


Bossy♥'s YOU said...

I think I may get second opinon..

iw ill post the right answer tonight or in the morning;)

I am paying in this year...damn gov. anyway;)

Nerdine said...

well - I'd let the boyfriend a look once in a while too. But not too often mind you - need to keep the tension up, won't we girls? haha

Felecia said...

Wearing a strapless dress is a great way to give those of us with the OPPOSITE problem you have a good ribcage workout... try keeping your chest extended and your belly flat - HA!! SNORT!! Now that's talent...

I'm going with the NKOTB as the lie. Not that I have *any* idea who you're talking about that hm... (Jordan was my fav...)

I second the second opinion - it's worth it.

momma of 2 said...

Super glue or double sided tape will keep the dress in place... I've never worn a strapless so I don't know...

as for the lie - I'm guessing #1 - but really hoping is the dine and dash.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

its ok to let them peek every now and then..:)

so I take it your lacking in the "girls" dept huh?..haha

Jordan huh..I liked Donnie, I mean I dont know who they are either;)

super glue?...are you sure about that?..cuz I would do it..haha

vani said...

its got to be the dine and ditch- just can't picture u pulling tat one..;)

and i'd be a little worried about my girls in strapless also-def use tape or something!

pack of 2 said...

I'm gonna guess #2.

Girl you know that the knob that is our president has to have all those tax dollars so he can build him some nuclear warheads. He doesn't care if your spawns need new shoes!


Bossy♥'s YOU said...

Oh trust me, between me and jennifer ( my furture step mom) we will both be using plenty of tape..haha

oh, your truth there speaks volumes..amen sista:)

and I need some new shoes..haha

Marel Lecone said...

I was thinking about the same too. There was no way you would skip out on paying a bill. You are just too good. And, perhaps, you should get a second opinion regarding your taxes. After all, you're making two mortgages and one house is a rental. Doesn't that count for something? :)

Memphis Steve said...

New Kids, eh? Scary!

I'm guessing the one about ... um ... I forgot.

Melis said...

Taxes... dayyyuummm girly! Burn that house up already before it eats you alive!! LOL

Dress.. I would LOVE to be able to wear a strapless.. but have the same fear!! Have you ever seen the "Priceless" pic that floats around the internet of the chic at the reception reaching up during the flower toss?? Uhhhhhh yeah.. NO WAY THAT'LL BE ME! lmao Good luck with that! Here's to hoping the fitting, two sided tape, and duct tape work out for ya! *wink* LOL

Samantha said...

Ok, the only truth that jumped out at me here was NKOTB.. WOOOHOOOO...LOL. And how did that conversation go? I would have been tongue

Wethyb said...

Doh. I thought it was the NKOTB thing :) LOL. But I'm glad it's the dine and ditch lie. Phew!

The only strapless I've ever worn was my wedding dress, but I'm not very busty. But don't worry, you'll like fabulous in it!

momma of 2 said...

okay - so maybe super glue won't work - the tube does say avoid contact with skin.... lol

Maybe the glue that is used to hold fake noses on - etc...

Good luck!

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