Monday, March 17, 2008

Irish Eyes r smiling

11 years ago today I birthed this..

opps, I mean this...


Sure u might think having a baby on St Patty's day would make your child birthing experience more enjoyable..

Franky, besides the gift basket full of green shit from the hospital, it was pretty traumatic for me...

He gave me an intense case of crotch ache and a roaring case of hemorrhoids.

The roids which lasted nearly a year and well, my nether regions have never been the same since..and ache to this day when I think about the hour of pushing I did, just so he could breath oxygen.

The first child to purge thru your birth canal kinda reeks havoc on the whole area.

After you birth your first kid, I am quite uncertain why we ever chose to do so again.

I remember when I had Blondie, she was about 2 weeks old at the time...And he was just going to be turning three shortly.

I had Blondie in her bouncy seat while I ran to the basement to switch out some laundry.

My dear first born comes running ever so proudly to me after I return from the basement.

His speech was pretty shotty, so I was about the only human to be able to decipher his language.

He told me that baby has bag on head..hahaha...punny momma

So me being the good language interrupter and mother that I am, knew this boy had done something to said baby in the 2 minutes I had been out of the area.

I walk into my living room where my tiny baby girl lay in her bouncing seat.

Atop her head was a plastic bag from Target, wrapped nicely around her huge head.

There stood my son all proud of the decorating he had done to that baby.

I took the bag off my baby's head and he asked me..

she go away now momma, I gots her in a bag now.

Like he put her in a bag for easy carrying for me.

God love him...He has just been trying to make life easier for me since day one.

Although he has a distortion of easier and being a big fat pain in the ass , but you will have that!

He is like me in many ways..

*he likes to blame his misfortune on others

*he is picky about who he chooses as friends

*he likes to get the wage of doing pristine work, whilst giving a half ass effort.

*he thinks his teacher is a douche bag

*he thinks having a girlfriend would just bring him down.

*he thinks Walmart sucks, even though they have low prices.

All and all he is a pretty good boy....He has his issues, but hell ,so does his dad.

So if u have a heart, give my mentally draining tot a big birthday wish..

Or I may put a bag over your head.

cause thats how I roll bitches.


Gette said...

Happy Birthday Butch!

The Kept Woman said...

Awwww, happy birthing and birthday to the both of ya.

Flip Flop Momma said...

I will pass it along:)

why thank u!

KrazyMom said...

Have a Happy Birthday, Butch! Maybe you should have saved the bag trick for your 'douche bag'....errr I mean teacher.

Fantastagirl said...

Happy Birthday Butch!

Bradley's Mom said...

Happy Birthday to the young man! I hope the day will be lots of fun and happiness for all of you!!

Sending lots of love your way!

Janell said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my virtual grandson! My virtual birthday present to you is an Electron Microscope. You can use it to prove Al Gore wrong on the global warming crap.

That was a good idea, putting your sister in a bag to make it easier for somebody to take her away. You've been a genius from day one, and don't let anybody tell you otherwise.

Flipflop, that picture of you two is so totally wonderful, I can't even tell you how much I like it.
I love you guys.

Cliff said...

So, are you thinking he did or didn't know what he was doing with the bag. I think he probably did. Happy Birthday to another brilliant male.

Katie said...

Happy Birthday!

I have to agree with you on your Walmart perspective.

Groovy Mom said...

That picture of him getting his haircut is too funny! You should have a caption contest.

Happy birthday to you little dude!

Tom said...

Awesome photo of Your Mom and You!
Butch Bee, I hope your year of 11 is full of all the joy of being 11 can offer..

Flip Flop Momma said...

I would need a double sized garabge bag for her..

Ma Linda,
thanks a bunch:)

he loves those micrscopes, in fact his real life grandma got him ur thinking right;)

Im glad u like the pic, that was taken last summer at our lake...he is a goof ball ya no..

pretty sure he knew Cliff..pretty sure of it..


he would prefer that pic be destroyed in sort of nuclear accident.

im sure it will be full of something alright..

just_tammy said...

Hey, at least he had the good taste to use a Target bag! Happy Birthday, Butch! Glad you survived the ordeal, Bossy!

Flip Flop Momma said...

yes, only class felons use Target bags;)

Notebooks said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Yippeeskip said...

I love the picture of you and him!!!! Happy Birthday Butch Bee.

Flip Flop Momma said...

Annymouss who left me a comment about visiting thier porn blog..thanks but no thanks..

thank u much;)

Dame Wonder said...

happy birthday to your sweet boy! i like that pic of you too a lot!


Anonymous said...

Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!!!!!

Patti said...

I am definitely wishing your boy a Very Happy Birthday!

BTW that's a great pic of the two of you!

Packof2 said...

Happy Bday Butch. He sounds like a busy guy. Glad the roids cleared up:)


Flip Flop Momma said...

thanks on both accounts;)

I will pass it along to him.

u know my specail boy needs special wishes..haha

well if by busy u mean lazy..u got it;)

thanks guys;)

Shannon said...

The pic at the bottom is really cute. Happy Birthday Butch!

catscratch said...

Hey Kid... Happy Birthday. Live long and prosper, boy!

JoeInVegas said...

Well, at least I'd be wrapped up for my wife to carry away.
OK - OK - Happy Birthday kid.

True_Floridian Momma said...

Happy Birthday!!!

thankfully I've never had the birth canal experience....although I wouldn't recommend getting them ripped from their womb through your's probably all the hurts!! :)

Jamie Dawn said...

LOVE that last photo of you and the boy.

The bag over Blondie's head would have freaked me out!!!

That first birthing experience is a doozie for sure.
It messes things up down there for good.

CMB said...

Happy Happy Birthday!
That was a cute post.