Well, it is down to the wire. Not sure how many days are left in Hanaka, but I dont even have a menroa or a draddle, so I am not a good Jew either. Bad Christian and an even worse JEw. I mean at least I do have the damn tree up. Killing a tree just so it can shed all over my damn floor. What hoilday bliss.
Tonight begins my wrapping extravganza. I start out good, top speed, nice neat folded corners. I can wrap the most ackward of packages. After the 3rd or 4th gift, it kinda looks like a blind fetus wapped it. By the time I get to the last gift, I dont even care if I have enough paper to cover the whole enitre gift..Thats the joy of being me, I dont give a rats ass if your gift is wrapped all the way, you just better be thanking God on your knees that you got something.
I hate Christmas.
I kinda hate Hananka too.
Im a holiday hater I suppose.
Friday is my dreaded holiday party in Blondies first grade class. I still am unsure what I bring. Her teacher called me last night, but I was working. I hate not knowing what am I suppose to do. I hate being in charge of anything. Putting me in charge of anything is a drastic oversight on anyones behave. This will teach them though I suppose. I was going to make some cookies, but unsure if I can...sometimes you cant bring in homemade things becuase holy shit i might put out of date eggs in it, or even some arsnic or something..
I need to find a job where I dont have to do any work, but still collect a paycheck. I am thinking my big idea to live on welfare is not going to pan out. Mr Shaky informed me that his income is much to high for me to apply for foodstamps and a state endorced credit card. All I want is welfare. Thats all. Is that to much to ask? I see women flipping out thier welfare cards all the time at the store. Able bodied laides with a brood of unclean chitlins. I want to be the stinky lady with unkept kids getting free shit. it is starting to eat away at me. I told Mr Shaky I may need to divroce him in order to live out my dream. He told me good luck. Then informed me that once the divorce is final, he wants free cheese from me. I told him thats fine, but he may need to pay me alimony under the tbale to suplemnt my drinking and my tattooing...Oh and my 1000 dollar concert tickets, my hair being cut and groomed ever so lovley, my nice clothes, the cat food for my dog, take out money so I can feed my kids Mcdonalds once a week, and a manny to take care of the kids while I have some alone time...or non kid time...or mommy time...and a good looking manny too, i need to see head shots before they are hired.
He told me I might as well just stayed married. I get all that stuff for free as it is. Welfare will come in good time.
That is a goal we can try and reach toghter..To not work, yet reicve compinsation for doing nothing..
Or win the lotto, makes no never mind to me I suppose. Although that would kinda of take away my theroy of "sticking it to the goverment"....I have been paying them all these years, and I just want them to pay it forward, thats all.
Boo just told me when she gets married and moves, she is going to move closer to where God is.
I hope she dont end up being a nun...First I will be married to a damn preacher, then a nun for a daughter...where the hell did I go wrong people?...Do U know me?..damnit.
my spell check aint working...so suck it....