Tuesday, December 12, 2006

I know what I want, and I want it now

So as I mentioned in my last post, Blondie has her list made, and it includes that ugly baby doll....among other numerous things..Including a pony.

My Boo, well she is what I refer to as a simple gal, or a woman of simplicity. For weeks she has been seeing all these ads for the coolest toys...And of course, she wants all of them. And Lord, if I could get her it all, I would..cuz I am a whore that way. One gift I bought her was a video game called V-SMILE. Its a game that makes retarded babies a tad more non retarded. I spent about 60 bucks on that...Not on eBay, I paid ole regular market value for that. But I could of saved myself a ton of money. I bought her all sorts of cool shit...But as of Monday, December 11, 2006..All my baby wants is a dang ole Chia Pet.

I tell her, you don't want that. Then she says.." Yes momma, I do want dat...It gwos"

I say, yes it grows...But u don't want that.

She insist she does. But u see, if I would of got her that V-SMILE for her birthday in August, she would now be smart enough to know she does indeed NOT want a CHia Pet. I blame this all on me.

Guess I am gonna head out and by my baby a chia pet...Next she will want the gol darn Clapper.

I have decided I need to quit my jobs and live off the state. I don't find anything wrong with this. I am even willing to break my own leg....Now that's a true dedicated person. How many of you would break one of your limbs?...None of u, cuz your all wussies.

I would have no troubles hacking off a few fingers in the name of Welfare, or disability...I have no pride or dignity. ..My only talents seems to be, but not limited too..

*knowing if a movie is good before I see it
*knowing if a TV show will last past the pilot episode
*knowing kids want anything they see on TV
*knowing my son will never lie again, unless its approiate.
*knowing my Blonde is getting a doll she will not play with for more then a day.
*knowing that global warming is a crock of shit
*knowing that penguins would not make good pets.
* knowing that I could write a better TV show then some I see on the air.
* knowing that I will never get or learn to play a violin.

Ok, enough bragging...

Well, I don't know....Maybe I don't even know that much.

ok, I know for a fact I don't know all that...I am just assuming.

Bee Real


1 plus twins said...

man i wish i would have known you were getting a v smile i would have sent you ours and the 8 - 12 games and two controlers we have for free. not a darn thing wrong with the boys are just too old aand into playstation 2 and xbox now.

Meow said...

Wow, the things we do for our kids !! In the past, I have bought my Chicky presents I thought would be great, only to have her play with them once or twice !! She wants a Nintendo DS ... just so she can play with silly Dogz on it !! We have a real cat ... she can play with that !!
Have a great week.
Take care, Meow

just_tammy said...

First of all, I absolutely hate the V-Smile ads since I'm a firm believer in child labor. Never in a million years would I tell a kid to stop doing something important to play with a game that might increase intelligence. They need definitely need to know how to clean a room but spelling KAT or DAWG is optional. (Okay, why didn't spell check have a problem with KAT but didn't like DAWG?! I think I just proved my point.)

Second, why are Chia pets only advertised at Christmas? Is that the only time those puppies spawn? Why am I not surprised Boo wants one and Bossy's going to be purchasing one today? Will it actually gwo? Anybody here know the answer to that one and is willing to share the answer even though it means admitting you wanted dat or had a lame relative? Anyone own a Clapper?

Finally, we know Bossy is all knowing that's why we come here to be edumacated.

just_tammy said...

Just saw this and thought maybe you would enjoy it in light of your recent shopping!

"I don't understand what Christmas means. It seems a ridiculous convention that everyone assumes."

You know you love your Prince!

aatank said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
aatank said...

That's not funny, My Kay wanted a clapper last year for Christmas. I couldn't find one so we bought one that you had to talk to, like light on-light off. Well needless to say that lasted one day because she couldn't say it loud enough for it to work. Money well spent I say.

I also heard that your Prince will be performing at the super bowl this year. Woot Woot!!

I see your taking lesson from the ole sis on the welfare. Way to go!! Ha Ha!!

keesh said...

I have the V smile, but I can't get my son interested and after parent teacher confrences with the pre school teacher last night I am convinced my son has a learning disability or a lack to learn what he HAS To know and only wants to learn what he WANTS to know...drives me bonkers...

Brandy said...

The things us parents do for our kids to make them happy.

Living off the state sounds good sometimes, but it dont buy you shit! LOL

On a side note: My son will be playing the Star Spangle Banner for the opening at a hockey game after the first of Jan. He nailed his audition!! Yay!!

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

ok, first I want to appologize for not stopping by your blogs as often. I have been swamped..but I do have the next two days off, so I plan on catching up today..

1 plus twins,
well darn it all...oh well..guess I had to waste money on something..but thanks for saying you woulda sent it to me;)

btw, I have tried about 20 times to get to your blog and I cant get the dang page to open..

my son wants a XBOX 360...I told him he has to get a job if he wants that;)

I know, I hate those ads too..But I figure hell, if it makes them THAT smart, soon they will be cleaning my room..

and Prince is a ..dare I say it..."jehahva witness"..thats why he says those things about x-mas..he is one sexy, talented, but weird man..But I would still "do him"

OMG..thats too funny...poor thing, i bet she would really loved the real one..but I have heard u have to clap super loud for it to work..

I am sure u will be glued to the tv for Prince as I will..hehe

lets give two cheers for welfare..hip hip hooray..hip hip hooray:)

He will grow out of it..dont worry.

oh thats so awesome about your son..u must be very proud..

and if living off thestate means I dont have to buy groceries, or other varoius items...I can live without some shit..haha

just_tammy said...

Yeah, I knew Prince was a JW, but I just thought it was funny since I saw the quote immediately after visiting with you. You know you will be watching his Super Bowl performance over and over again.

I realized I owe you an apology for the Chia Pet/lame relative comment since that would apply to you. Loving mothers buy Chia Pets (and Clappers for that matter).

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

well I am not sure I will be buying the chia pet..the tow older ones had one a few years ago...and they are a pain in the ass..

and u know u will be glued to the tv too on SB Sunday..dont lie now.

Neurotic1 said...

Oh come on Bossy- buy her a chia pet. They really do grow. My brother got my dad one for x-mas one year and we put beer in it and the damn thing still grew. We also had a clapper growing up. Everytime one of us would yell the damn tv would go on and off! Next Boo will be wantin' a flowbee!

js said...

i also am a whore

i buy my ma-in-law a chia pet every year, its the only gift I actually purchase myself.

I believe you could write the show mo better.

I could write and direct a porn film far more better than the standard.

my kids are touched also.

santa is dead, my kids daddy slayed the vicious deer and their momma will fry them and we will consume them.

The spots on the globe where I am present are warmer, to that there is no doubt.

ole j

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

well butch and blonide had them a few years ago...butch had the dinosaur and blondie had scooby do..and yes they grow, but after like a week they start turning yellow..haha..maybe i shoulda used beer..

what the hell is a flowbee?...damn..never heard of that..see I dont get out much.

BTW, if any of you have beta blogs, I can no longer commetn on them..I tried commentin on Brandy's and Pegs, and I cant....damn thing..Blogger isnt gonna force me to turn to beta..fuc* You blogger..Bossy aint budging.

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

u know..u really should be in fedral prison for killing santa and eating his only mode of transportation..

buying your MIL a chia pet?..crakcer, now thats cheap..u tight wad..

Neurotic1 said...

A flowbee was that neat contraption that you could connect to your vacuum and cut hair. Who'd a thunk that one up?

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

wow, I never heard of such a thing?...I think I may need one now.

U no so many things:)

js said...

i am a tight wad but the outlaws better be damn tickled they get anything!
I ain't much on gift buying, I am all for gifts as rewards for things well done but gifts for no reason i'm pretty much against, when they attempt to force me to purchase them by inventing a reason to do so, I will by gifts out of the blue but I don't buy them just on account of its in law day or 3rd wife day or hair stylist day or whatever.
im a rebel without a clue like that
Rebel J

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

Rebal Cracker,
man, u mean bidness dont u?...I pretty much dont buy anyone anything unless the calander says I gots to..like birthdays, x-mas,hanukka,kwanza,groundhog day,hepre awareness day..u name it.

it has to be marked in black and white somewhere for me to buy shit..number one, i hate shopping, and B...I am abitch that way;)

Choppzs said...

Well Bossy, you know what they say about assuming don't you? lol

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

yup..i was gonna write that, but didnt think I could pull it off..didnt think it would look right..haha

thought guru J said...

thats the times i WILL NOT buy things
i am 100% against buying birthday gifts
why get a present because you were birthed?
or because you lived a year?
I contend (you ight like my thinkin here) that your momma ought to get gifts
I mean she did tote your sorry unappreciative ass around for 9 months the force you from her guts (tearing up the fun zone for weeks and weeks) and then allowed you to suckle your nourishment from her teats.
she deserves the damn gifts!
so there is fil-o-so-fee per JS

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

I am with u on the birthday thing....until my kids get jobs, I will continue to buy for them..but after their 10th birthday, its all about me..and this will be butchs last year gettin gifts..

although, i have never purchased my mom a gift on may 2...am I am bad daughter cracker?

js said...

that is bad
unless of course your momma is a b-i-t-c-h
then I can forgive that no gift buying.
She carried your sorry unappreciative ass....... you know the rest
fun zone
but ifn you don't get along then you don't gotta
and you dont have to buy your new little sister, oooops step mom one either, but if the kids like her and she is good to them then they should make her something or a pic or whatever

how did Big Poppa Bee's ticker hold up while they were doin it like wabbits in Vegas?

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

well, I tell my mom if she would not of got knocked up when she was 16..she would not of had to birth me...I told her its her fault for being a slut at such a young age..( i mean i was a slut too, but a smart one;)

well, acctually I have only talked to her..not sure if my dad made it back or not...now u gots me wonderin cracker..

Kendra Lynn said...

I WISH my kids would ask for something for Christmas! The poor things don't have a clue what they want. LOL
Good thing I"m already done shopping for them.
They each asked for ONE item from Santa.
And guess what Kelsey wants?
A spider. Yep.
A pretend spider that she can SLEEP with.
Oh yeah.
My kids have issues.


Sir Slut said...

I was, am and enjoy being a slut.

Slutty J said...

sluts rule
I love sluts
why you gotta be down on sluts for?

Bossy♥'s YOU said...

not to worry, as one of mine wanted a penguin, remeber?

Cracker likes sluts,
well, I am not down on them...they just shouldnt breed, thats all.

cathouse teri said...

You're so cute. If you need any reference to let the state know that you, of all people, need to be on state assistance ~ as you should not be out in public unrestrained ~ just give them my number.

I don't do any christmas shopping. Everyone I know knows that I don't have any money so they won't be getting anything but my presence for Christmas. :)

Strangely, they seem quite content with that.

js said...

ok whew
I thought you were dissin us!
me and my slut buds that is
i'm glad to know your ok with sluts long as they don't take the deposits serious.

Princess said...

I would so watch your show if you wrote one! I agree, it would be better and funnier then most of the shit on these days!

Penguins as pets... I would like to try that!! :D that could be fun


Badoozie said...

i would SO break my own legs. just to get money or attention. i've seriously considered here lately, driving in front of a large semi truck just so i could get mangled beyond recognition. becuase i'm sick of men, and i'm sick of them looking at me, me thinking they are nice, hooking up with them and then either having to divorce their ass's or throw myself in front of moving trucks due to a broken heart. enough said.

Badoozie said...

and no, i'm not switching sides. i like weiners, with a man attached to them.