Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Working for the weekend

I have about had it. Dare I say I am fed up. That sounds like such a mom thing to say..

"hey, I am fed up with your attitude young lady"..Crap I am old.

I have not aired my woes in a while, and I feel this is the time. I may burst if I don't..So beware...This might not be pretty..

Here is the first thing that is pissing me off...

The house we own in Michigan, is rented out..Because hell I aint married to a Rockefeller and I don't wanna make two damn house-payments. Well the jokers/asswipes who rent it cant pay on time..EVER, so my nice kind real estate lady pays us, then she collects the money from said asslickers. Well yesterday was the 14th and we still had not received it. I might as well be waiting for said asslickers to send it. I informed her that unless her checkbook was over thrown by monkeys or she was in a coma for the last month, there indeed was no reason why are rent was not here on the 1st.

Number two...

why do you dismiss school early for a football game but not for a blizzard or when its say -120 degrees outside? Thursday both kids schools are letting out at 11:45? Why the Sam bloody hell do I bother sending them? That is not nearly enough time to run my meth lab. No meth will be made, bought or sold that day I guess.

Number three...
don't call me in to work 3 hours before you need me, because holy shit bossy has a life..

Number four..
I forgot what I was going to say...crapola..

~
You will never guess what my boo bee said she wanted for Christmas. Guess, go ahead.
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A fuc*ing penguin.

Kidding around as I was leaving for work I told her I would get her one...I asked her if she wanted a boy or girl ...She said " no momm, I want baby penguin"

I then inform her that she will need to buy penguin food, and they like fish so she needs to go fishing.

I head out the door and she thanks me for getting a penguin...

I come home and the first thing she asks me is ,if momma got her penguin.

what the hell, you remembered about the damn penguin?

Not only that, but she told me she needed to go fishing, so she can feed her baby penguin fish..

Guess Bossy has to get a penguin...fuc*it.....note to self, don't make jokes with a three year old cause holy batshit that they cant tell when ur making a funny.

~
We are leaving in 4 days for the homeland to attend the wedding of the century...no not the Tomcat wedding...rather the jenarry wedding.

wow that was pretty damn clever on my part..See her name is Jennifer my dads name is Larry...Get it jenarry?

Ok I better go get my damn penguin...Can they be litter trained..Yes...No..Anyone?

Bee Real

27 comments:

Anonymous said...

Have Santa get her a stuffed animal penguin and some small plastic fish to feed it.

gal artist said...

LOL, good luck with the whole penquin thing.

eyes_only4him said...

jd rose,
I dont see why they cnt either;)

anonymous,
well I was thinking about having santa go to the build a bear workshop and make her one....:)

Deni,
I have a feeling I might need it:)

Peggy said...

Write her a letter from Santa telling her Santa is happy she wants a penguin but that baby penquins need their momma for a long long time so he left her penguin at the zoo. Print a picture off the net for the letter of a baby one. Have Santa tell her he wants her to go to the zoo and make sure the momma is taking care of baby and to name it. Tell her she needs to make sure its happy and getting lots of fish.

eyes_only4him said...

Peggy,
your a damn genius..dont tell me u once promised one of ur kids a penguin and couldnt deliver..hehe..

Neurotic1 said...

We want to buy a new house in the next year and Mr. Conservative wants to rent this one out. No way I say- I don't want the hassle! I'm surprised they don't sell baby penguins these days- I mean Barbie has a pooping dog and there is a true to life pony on showcase at our local target. It's amazing what you can find. Toys have come a long ways since I was a kid. I had lincoln logs and tinker toys! I was deprived!

Tammy said...

Kids are not as dumb as we think. They are smart and therefore we must be very careful what we say.
I am finding with Ethan I have to watch what I say now.

Just get her a stuffed penguin. That should work.

eyes_only4him said...

Neortic,
yes I vote against renting the house...we had ours for sale for over a year, but u know what a hot commidty our homeland is...thus we had to rent it out..

yup I had linlocn logs, remeber those sit and spins?..had those..and one of them dolls were you put the green food in her mouth and it went right thru her like she shit her pants...yup them were the days1

Tammy,
yup, kids catch on to everything..I thought she was a retard, but she proves me wrong time and time again!

Anonymous said...

haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
well i dunno about the penguin
but i am glad i decided i hadta be at a meeting on the day you vented!
j
Tell her you picked out the penguin but then you saw the rule book and you have to be at least 10 before you are allowed to have a penguin! the "rule Book comes in handy for me often

Anonymous said...

I think you should just get her the penquin. You could train it to attack the ugly kid who steals your kids stuff.

Take pictures!

eyes_only4him said...

Cracker,
a rule book?...ok anohter great idea...can I inseret my penis rules into said rule book? or does that have to be a seprate book?

Laura,
I was half thinking the same thing, only not a penguin but a hungry bear or a Tiger who hasnt ate in weeks:)

Anonymous said...

Penis ruoles need their own book, well they can share a book with V-Jag-Na rules i suspect.
In any delimma I always resort to the rule book. The crumb, that'd b my son, crumb-cracker get it?, said he wouldn't give me any more kisses until I taught him to play poker. He's 3 for the love of Dr. Zuess.
anyway
the "rule" book said I couldn't teach him to play till he was 10, I was informed that the rule book said he couldn't kiss me until he was a poker player?!?!?!

the P-V rules need to be seperated tho from all other rules
js

Unknown said...

I hate half days too. Like we have nothing better to do than get up early drive their asses to school then turn around and go back to pick them up again... geez! Another year I wont have to worry about driving them anywhere.. Yay! Love teens who get their driver license!!

A PENGUIN??? And you acutally joked with her about that...LMAO!! Hey on a side not here... You will never believe what I got at Joanns the other day. I got a penguin that walks and poops out little pieces of candy.. Yes I said poop!! They are only like 3 bucks and I bet she will forget about the real one!! hehehe

eyes_only4him said...

Cracker,
I was afraid it would need its own book...there goes anotther tree..

but ur on to something with the rule book..I told my son when he was 4 he could not lift weights till he was nine...thinking he would forget..guess what he asked me the other day..

damn kids..

Brandy,
oh now thats funny..a penguin who poops candy...that would make boo so happy..she loves tot alk about butts and poop, she loves penguins and she loves cnady:)

Peggy said...

No one of my girls wanted a baby monkey. But the letter worked! LOL

Anonymous said...

surely being the quick thinker you are you said "butch your not nineeeeeeeeeeeeteen yet!"
son did you misunderstand me when I said 19?
hehe

eyes_only4him said...

Peggy,
well at least monekys can wear dipares and they will pick the lice outta your hair:)...but I am going to do yur letter idea..it is brillant!

Cracker,
well I told him that with increase in the cost of living it was pushed back to 12:)

Anonymous said...

haaaaaaaaaa
there ya go good answer
j

eyes_only4him said...

well its not the ebst come back, I just hate being put on the spot by a snot nose kid:)

Unknown said...

If you come through here on the way to the HomeLand let me know and we'll do lunch...on the interstate...at some classy truck stop...it'll be educational for the kids.

And a penguin? Damn, I'm lucky mine is just asking for a computer and a radio...

eyes_only4him said...

TKW,
well we norammly stop in Madison WIs when we travel...I am not sure what way we are going..we were talking of headed thru the UP of Michigan, but I dont know..

and I love truck stops, u can get good heart attack food there:)

hmm, why do my kids not ask for noraml stuff like guns and ponies?..why a penguin?..

Michele_3 said...

I'm in disbelief over here~
I can't believe it is going to be Christmas- for some reason I'm not ready for the holidays and all the craziness it brings just yet..LOL!

That is too cute- Boo wants a penguin,are you taking her to see "Happy feet" My little man wants to see that movie really bad..It looks so cute!

P.S- time to threaten eviction to renters if they don't pay up..

Take Care~
:)

Choppzs said...

Uh yah, you totally set yourself up on that one there Bossy!! lol 3 yr. olds remember EVERYTHING!! Well except not beat up other siblings, or swear, or clean up, or wipe their asses, but they do remember when they are promised something!! lol

And how hard can a penquin be to train? hahahahahaha, I'd pay to see it!

cathouse teri said...

hahaha... I think maybe little Boo will have to be content knowing that penguins can't possibly survive in a house! She'll have to settle for the candy pooping one :)

Parents can be so mistaken in their promises. My grandpa promised me mum that he would get her a t-bird when she graduated high school. He bought her a little model of one. I wonder if she thought that was funny? Well... he'd always been a drunk. I'm pretty sure she didn't REALLY expect one. :)

Kendra Lynn said...

Two years ago Merry was absolutely conviced that Santa was going to bring her a hippopotamus. Yes...that stupid song is the culprit!!
I searched high and low for a hippo toy...finally found a really realistic looking stuffed hippo and ordered it.
She didn't like it,but Kelsey LOVES the hippo. lOL
Good luck finding a penguin that won't crap on your floor.

Kendra

Foxy said...

LOL- that is too cute. Now you have to go steel one from a zoo! Good luck on that one.. :)

Cliff said...

Better find a heater for your wading pool. You'll need it up there.
I never wanted to live in a place people referred to as: 'Up there."