Monday, November 13, 2006

Billys got a gun

I was not feeling well for a few days. I was either thinking that the devil had cast some very bad spell on me and was cursing me with some form of morning sickness, or I had the bird flu...

I was so praying for the bird flu.

hence it stopped...So no spawn of Satan to be born and no avian flu....Although I was so pulling for the avian flu...

~

I got a new piece of excersie equipment. It is so totally worth the money that was spent on it. Its fun, and you can bounce. Who the hell doesn't like to bounce?

This is what I have..











Its called the UrbanRebound. And I heart it..

My new workout schedule goes as follows..

30-60 minutes running/walking on my treadmill
20 minutes of the rebound..(comes complete with a workout dvd..And let me say, its a workout..)
20 minutes of weight training..

Gosh with doing this 6 days a week, my fat ass should be shed in NO time...

I am hoping by tomorrow anyway....

~

So we have had a new development since I posted my penis rules...

Let me state it all again for those who missed it..Now pay attention..

if u have one of these..









under no uncertain circumstances do you call THIS..

















@
@
@



Or you are subject to the wrath of this..
*
*
*
*
*
*





















!
!

and it wont be pretty, trust me!




Are we all clear on this?

You see, a few days ago my Blondie Bee got a phone call. This was the jist of it.

what r u doing

nothing what r u doing

nothing..

what did u have for dinner

blah blah blah

ok bye..

bye..

Of course I am paraphrasing the boy. This is just what I assume was being said. My phone lines are now tapped, so I can go back and listen to these calls should they happen again.

When I asked her about this boy, I asked if he was her boyfriend, and she told me yes..

OH HELL NO!

then I asked her if he was cute and she said..."Momma"

I said "well is he an ugly kid or a cute kid"...And u know what she said...I cant get it out of my brain..

well momma, I will just say...He looks nice

someone please shoot me.

Bee Real

31 comments:

Unknown said...

Its begun.... I dont have the problem with the boys calling my daughter. I do however have the problem with the girls calling my son! Geez dont their mommas teach them anything.

Love your new exercise thingie. Have to let me know if it helps or not. The pilates are doing it for me for now. I have now shed off 5 pounds in a couple of weeks time.

Hope you are feeling better!

PS Wooo Hooo I got to leave a comment first!!!

eyes_only4him said...

brandy,
and who the hell lets 6 year old use the phone, i mean they only learned to talk 5 years ago..for petes sake:)

Choppzs,'
its fun too..u would love it..i highly recomend it..

and yes ..high fives all around for no bird flu..or anything else that would be worse;)

Anonymous said...

the exercise bouncie thing looks fun! I wonder if i can get one with a dvd workout dvd here. note to self: must look in target

Your daughter is cute. Its just a cute thing, they wont do much except hold hands. Im sure she is still at boy germs stage and wont be kissing it!

Jo said...

I read your blog and have a chuckle, I cant believe that we are so much alike its scarey.. everything I read.. i can relate to it.
Have a great week

Unknown said...

lol I want one of those bouncy things lol

too funny, he's nice looking lol

eyes_only4him said...

hails,
the bouncy thing was purchased thru QVC its a homeshopping channel, and my blondie better not hold hands with anyone but me;)

littlejen,
oh gosh, I was hoping there was only ONE of me..haha

dakota,
I know, what 6 year old says he is nice looking?...

1 plus twins said...

oh my god you are in trouble. if they are calling now just think how it is gonna be when she becomes 16!! i am so thankfull i have boys!! can my son or sons call your daughter!! lol just kidding!

Neurotic1 said...

Okay so you get direct tv and now you are buying off of QVC. I have family members that are addicted. Let me know when I need to intervene. But my Mom uses one of those thing-a-ma-jiggies and her trainer swears by it. Good luck and keep us posted as to how it does! I was sick this weekend too. I actually sharted my pants- can you say that!

eyes_only4him said...

1 plus twins,
NO they can NOT call...your boys are older, she cant talk to older men;)

Neurtotic,
acctually my mom is the one who bought it, and we keep it here cuz i have a treadmill, and a cute reebok weight bench, so we have our own gym..hehe...

but i must say its fun to workout with..u should get one;)

and u did not do that in your pnats..did u?..hehe

hope u get feeling better!

MommaMonkey said...

Ok, how the hell do you find the time to work out that much in one day with three kids, all your random animals, and a hubby to take care of?

And as for Blondie's new boyfriend, maybe he has REALLY GREAT PERSONALITY!

eyes_only4him said...

Blazer,
well, my workouts are something I will do wether I have a kid bleeding profusly or if my house was on fire..

oh and I saw this kid...a week before school she had an openhouse, all the parents and kids went, this little lad sat right beside her, and when his mom poilitey introdcuded Blondie to him, she turned her back and ignored her..

damn..and he is a cute little blonde boy..

but if he calls here again I will kill him with me bare hands:)

Kendra Lynn said...

Are you tellin' me that boys will be callin' my girls when they are ten???? Oh NO WAY!!!! NOT HAPPENIN'.
They won't be allowed to receive calls from boys until they are 20...or maybe older.

Kendra

eyes_only4him said...

vani,
i need to lose all that too..wanna come workout with me?

Kendra,
10?..she is 6!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Granny said...

The fun is just starting.

Cliff said...

I'll pay cash for a video of you or practically any other female bouncing on one of those machines for 20 minutes. I'm thinking about the end of the Man Show here.

eyes_only4him said...

Granny,
thats what I was afraid of;)

JD<
yes, and ur time will soon come;)

Cliff,
it really isnt as glamourous a su may think...and when u have on a good sprots bra, it takes away from all the glamour of the bouce;)

keesh said...

Ok, but here's the thing, since I delivered a 9 and a half pound baby 4 years ago, I pee my pants if I bounce...what can I do about that so I too can heart one of these things?

eyes_only4him said...

Kish,
ok I pushed 3 eight pounders...but goodness I am glad I was not afflicted with that..

one word..DEPENDS:)

Unknown said...

Ummmmm...NO!

What the hell? She's a baby! When does this boyfriend/girlfriend shit start?

I'm turning the locks around on my kids' doors...

Laura Elizabeth said...

I'm with brandy on girls calling boys.

HEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOO!!

Don't let your girly bees do this, Bossy, or their MaMa's will come after you. Oh, and their MaMa's will call your girly bees very, very, very bad names.

I've got two adorable 12 year old nephews and the girls have been calling for about a year now. My sisters-in-law go through the roof every time it happens and the things they call these girls MaMa's... added a whole new level to my swearing ability!

Kendra Lynn said...

OMG...no way is Merry gettin' calls from boys in TWO YEARS!!! Not happenin'.
I will string them up by their little wee-wee's if they start callin' that early...or any earlier than 12 or 13. Lord have mercy!

Kendra

eyes_only4him said...

TKW<
it starts way to damn soon honey..too damn soon.

Laura,
oh hell no my kids are NOT calling anyone of the opposite sex unless its thier doctor...i wish this little boys parents would incoproate the same rules:)

Kendra,
yup..u just wait:)

Unknown said...

Ditto on the bouncy stress incontinence thing. I love my mini-tram, but I have to empty my bladder before I use it. And do kegels.

That oughta ruin poor Cliff's man show visions...

keesh said...

I don't fully pee, just trickles. it affects me most when I bounce, sometimes when I sneeze but mostly when I bounce and Kegals, fuck that. they don't work. excuse my language...

eyes_only4him said...

Gette,
I find that once I start boudcing i have to pee, but i can normally wait to go when i am done, although yesterday i did stop and go..cuase the bouncing makes you really have to go..

Kish,
I have never thought Kegels work, although some swear by them..I am not one of them..

get some poise pads, come over and we will have a bouncing party:)

Unknown said...

ok it IS kinda cute when they're her age....but wait til she turns 12. it's not so cute. and i read all the msn convos.

i don't worry about the phone lines. They're not so brave on the phone or face to face...but they'll say ANYTHING on msn!

Michele_3 said...

Oh no, The boys are already lining up for your little "Meg Ryan" LOL!
I know how you feel, My oldest gets calls from girls and I'm like "What is going on here?"

Shouldn't he be calling them? His first call was when he was in 1rst grade- the girl called all summer saying she missed him(Drove me CRAZY) (I was surprised her mom let her call a boy)Boys are suppose to chase girls not the other way..LOL!
Let me know how the excerscise thingy works out!
Take Care :)

eyes_only4him said...

Mrs,D
holy cow, my kids will never chat on line, I will take the computer away, I wouldnt be able to handle that..I eman I have seen those dateline specails on internet predators..sick puppeis..and my kids are stupid enough to give out thier address, phone number and anything else they are asked...pissers..hehe

Michle,
I know, gilrs should not be calling boys..should they? In fact, no one should be calling anyone unless they pay the phone bill!

Meow (aka Connie) said...

I know how you feel, Bossy ... my Chicky has had little boys phoning her up for years, and I STILL DON'T LIKE IT !!! She is 12 years old now, thinks she knows it all ... what do you do ?!?!? Fortunately, she thinks kissing boys is yucky, still !!
Sadly, they grow up, things change ... waaaaahhhhhhh !!
Hey, the new exercise stuff looks great ... must look into one of those.
Take care, Meow

Anonymous said...

Its great isn't it when life slaps you in the face.

Graffiti

Anonymous Fat Blogger said...

I could've lived without seeing that banana hammock today :)

My God woman, all the exercise you do puts me to shame! I'm gonna go eat a Twix now.