Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Rag Doll

Im warning you now, this post will be a tad rantish and I will be sprinkling the F-bomb around like its carpet fresh room deodorizer. So if your at all faint of heart, or don't want to read some choice 4 letter words, just put your shoes back on and leave for today.

I have mentioned before about our house in the Homeland that has been for sale since 2004. The bitch wont sell because no one wants to buy a home there...Its a hole in the wall sorta city, sorta like this one....BUT that's beside the point.

Anyway, since we moved here we have had several renters in the house. Which has sorta been helpful, because we would pay the house payment with the rent..

Last summer the people living in it not only could not afford the rent, but when they moved out, they left without paying any of their bills.

So at this point we decided to let the bank have their house back, because frankly, it was giving me a fucking ulcer.
Our realestate lady found other people to rent it until the whole foreclosure thing was complete...she said no sense in not renting it and making some extra money.

So thats what we have been doing...I think we have about 5 more months before the house is not ours...its still for sale, so there is always a glimmer of hope it will sell...doubtful, but its there.

Well, I don't know who lives in the house, don't know the name or phone number, because she takes care of everything...She never told us the name never gave us the info.

So, the middle of March came and we still had no rent, which is not uncommon because these asshats have never paid on time..But when we finally got a hold of her, she told us they did not have the money now, but would by months end.

Now this is my issue. The rent is only 500 bucks a month. Who can not afford that? I am not sure why these white trashy folks think they don't have to pay rent.

I mean I would love to not have to make my 1100 monthly payment to Wells Fargo bank, but if I don't, they will take my house bye bye..

For the last 3 weeks we have been calling and leaving her messages, to which she does not return.

It is now going on the middle of April and we are now owed 1,000 smackaro's.

I just wanna fly there, knock on my fucking door and kidney punch all of them. even the tots. even the dog, if there is one...
My realestate lady is very unprofessional. I think because of the fact she is sure she wont be seeing any money from this house, she doesn't give a shit.

Well, the nice email and message I left her today will make her think twice about screwing me over.

We have paid her tons of money over the last 3 years and she aint done shit...

Now she wont return calls. Again.

Im a fixing to put a cap in her ass, then kick her in the shins, then pulling her hair out, stomping on her gut, then stealing her wallet.

All in a days work for me.

She goes to church with my grandma and played the fucking organ at my grandpa's funeral. So I don't want to be to brutal to her as my grandma has to see her every Sunday, but golldamnit, this bitch is tired of it.

Im tired of being nice to her because she is a friend of my grandma's. Im just going to treat her like I do everyone else.

Like shit.

Since its been muddy and shit, I have a sign on my door to please remove your shoes. Normally I dont care, because I have to wear shoes other wise my feet get sore. Im old that way so screw off.

My mother made some smart ass comment about her having to take her shoes off yet mine were on.

This is what I told her.

well, its my house, I can clean up after myself...This however is NOT your house and if you have issue taking your shoes off, then don't come over...

now take your fucking shoes off or leave,

I know..I blew up..

But damnit, I'm tired of her thinking she doesn't have to obey the rules here.

I have another rule. No drinking in my living room. Guess who drinks in here?

So the other day I told her she needs to get her drink out of my living room before something bad happens.

Im tired of her not thinking the rules apply to her.

Please, don't come here if you don't want to listen to the house rules. If God Himself came into my house without taking His sandals off, I would put a nicely placed cap in His ass too...
For Petes sake, I obey rules...why does everyone else think they don't need to?

You don't wanna pay your rent?

don't...I mean it works for some people.
You don't wanna take your shoes off when stepping foot in my house?
Don't, but don't expect to stay long, because I will kick you out, then shove one or both your shoes up your pooper.
Cause thats how I roll.

And another thing, don't tell me your going to start dressing better, then still wear the same crap daily. I have been waiting for your one GQ thing a week, for two fucking weeks now.

you are officially cut off.
Im getting pissy here folks. Can u tell?

I will leave you with some pics over the last couple weeks..

this was just a Friday nite karaokeing....im cool as shit...see

same nite, im cozying up to my fuzzy pull over, cause its cold...

me and pale girl....

the more i look, the more i think she may not be capable of producing color..

Ok, sorry for the vile post, but its my blog....and thats how shit is done...


Tom said...

Yikes....well, if I get the invite over, then I follow the house rules and I wear clean socks everyday and shower lavishly every day no prob there....If you didn't blow up at your Mom, you wouldn't have a good relationship...superficial relationship really...at you and mom keep it real. As far as the house goes, well, emotions don't belong in business and just go through whatever legal channels are needed. It's all you can do..if the legal channels are worth the hassle, but being emotional about money never does anyone good.

Flip Flop Momma said...

well since i wont be owning the house much longer, no sence in getting any legal action..Ive had to do that with other renters and it costs me more then it was worth..

i just hate it when people think they dont have to play by rules..

I bet u pay your housing costs every month..ha

Dame Wonder said...

we all have our difficulties to face. it builds character. that said, i would want to make all those deadbeats homeless. hey, don't apologize for your rant. we're all entitled to have bad days and rip on our own blog for crap's sake! life can suck momentarily and get fun again. duck, weave, and roll with the punches! you know you're a tough momma. ;)

Flip Flop Momma said...

I just love u:)

just_tammy said...

Sooo do you feel better now?! Better out than in and that includes your 'renters'! I think I'm paler than pale girl...so what does that make me?

Flip Flop Momma said...

Alibino girl!

Vani said...

yeah you def need to put a cap in her ass! lol

The Blogger Formerly Known as Scarlet... said...

That friend of yours is REALLY white compared to you. I also get tired of putting up with someone because that someone happens to get along w/ someone you care about. That real estate lady needs to get paid in reality checks.

Flip Flop Momma said...

consider it done:)

I think everyone is darker then her...BUT I do go tanning twice a week..haha..

some people need a good ass kicking.

Anonymous said...

I'm really not sure what is going on here but If I had to guess I'd wager that you are gonna shove a rusty shiv in someones spine..I'm available for help[

Meow (aka Connie) said...

Sorry to hear you are having problems with your house in the homeland ... sounds like a real problem. HOpe it miraculously sells, before the bank takes it.

And, I can so agree about the shoes off thingy ... I've been there, blown my stack over it too !!

Hope you and the family are keeping well, and staying out of mischief !!

Take care, Meow

Cliff said...

Is it possible to strain the piss out of the Wheaties and then go back to whole milk?

Flip Flop Momma said...

well bring a butter knife.

its a major pain in my ass...

I just want it to be gone..damn

why do the Wheaties have piss in them?

So Not The Bradys said...

Pale Girl is a good example of why I go to the tanning bed. I may be the whitest white girl possible without a tan. And besides not glowing in the dark, it's 20 minutes twice a week that no one is yelling "mom" or "hon, where's my..."

Anyway, it's good to rant and rave and let it all out. If you don't, you'll be found rocking and drooling in a corner and chewing on crayons.

Life sucks sometimes. Sometimes, it gets better eventually. This too shall pass.

Flip Flop Momma said...

NOT the Brady's,
I know...I go twice a week...

but I rotate between stand up and lay down..haha

Sometimes ya just gotta let it out or your gonna murder a whole city..huh..

catscratch diva said...


All I can say is YOU GO GIRL!!

CMB said...

Well dervered! I would be just as pissed. Money is money and people seem to forget that. Don't 'rent' something you can not pay for. I too am a rule follower so I can understand this rant perfectly.
I hope you get your money and that Mom starts to listen!

pack of 2 said...

you did'nt say the f bomb as much as you should have.

Dyspraxic Fundamentalist said...

I always ask people visiting my house to take their shoes off.

People here in England tend to wear shoes most of the time, so they usually have disgusting carpets.

I dedicated an whole blog to the subject of removing shoes:

Shoes Off at the Door, Please
You might want to take a look.