Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Blondes have more fun

I sometimes wonder what I am thinking when i do certain things. Like cut my hair, buy a slutty bra, or have babies.

Sure when you have your first baby, its kind of trial and error. Everything is new and you are just blown away daily by the shit that fills up the diaper..what baby can produce so much fecal matter?

You learn to deal with it..then when they are potty trained you still continue to wipe the ass because they just can not get the hang of it and tend to leave skid marks in their spider-man underoo's.

Then you think its a wise idea to add one more baby to that, because handling toddler fecal matter and infant fecal matter is just something one thinks they can handle all at once.

Almost nine years ago I did just that. I added another baby to the well established one I had already.

When you have one wizzing in the crapper and that can put his own underwear on and feed himself, even though u still have ass wiping to do, you are pretty much free and clear of all things baby.

Yet, most of us go do that silly thing and have relations with no means of sperm control.

My middle baby was not only my biggest one to push forth, but she was also my worst sleeper, had jaundice the worst, and was talking in full sentces by 9 months which means I have been listening to her babble now non stop for many years.

She sure was the fugliest looking baby I had seen up to that point. I had pushed her out so fast her face was bruised.

After 24 hours her troll like appreance turned into something specail.

She morphed overnite into a beauty.

Sure, all moms think their daughters are pretty, trust me I know.

She is not only a knock out in her appreance, she truly has something that makes me want to be a better person..It does not work alot, but the fact she harbors that for me is a good thing.

She wants to be a vet when she grows up, and she wants to live on a farm and grow corn and have cows and horses.

My baby girl has the bluest eyes, and the brightest smile...nothing like her mother.

I think thats what so specail about her, she is nothing like me. And I am greatful for that.

We look alike, but she will grow up to be a much better person that I could ever dream of being.

It makes me proud, yet it also makes me angry.

I look at her and see me when i was nine years old, and she outshines me by 100 miles.

She gets mad at me for yelling at the dog. She loves to do the dishes, but she hates to clean her room.

On the weekend if her and Boo get up early, she will make Boo breakfast all on her own..

I never wanted kids when i was a younger. In fact, other peoples kids drove me nuts..

still do...

Blonde excels in school, has had boys wanting to marry her since pre school, and is a world class althete...i say that because she kicks my ass at all the Wii games, plus she can run circles around a fuckin cheeta.

So here is my girl, who will turn one year older on Super Bowl Sunday..

I am now going to show some older pics of her, just because I can..

Thats her on the ferris wheel at the Mall of America when she was 4.

this is her learning to ride a bike when she was 5.

just chilling in the grass on a hot summer day.

Anyway, my kid is having a birthday and well...I am just telling u..

Wanna know what I got her?

She does not know yet, and these bitches are camping out in my room till the weekend.

cause im a cool mom and shit..

there is Boo posing with them...
a bought a couple of rodants...
thats what cool hip moms do..
So happy birthday to my 9 year old baby girl..
Somewhere there is a pile of manure with her name on it.
(cause she wants to be a farmer and a vet, not because I think she is shitty)


Bradley's Mom said...

I hope she has the happiest birthday ever!!!! She really is a beautiful girl, inside and out!

She will love the hamsters. You are an awesome Mom!!

Love ya!

PS This time it took my comment! Don't know why it wouldn't before!!

JoJo said...

Aww happy birthday to your baby girl. She is beautiful and she is like her mum!!

Hugs xx

Anonymous said...

Shes pretty asa speckled pup. You sure she aint mine? I'm thinking the timing is right.....

Best, Punchy! said...

(Standing up and clapping!) what a wonderful tribute to your drop dead gorgeous daughter!! YOU SO ROCK! Happy, happy birthday to your beautiful sweet daughter! They grow up sooooooooooo fast!!

Just wait...

Rocker_MoM said...

i am glad the comments are owkring now for u, I have missed your comemnts:)

aww, thanks..bless your cotton socks:)

hmm...well...u can take credit for this one, but I thought the boy was yours.

first up, I love your user name..

ok moving on...thank you very much..

I know the grow fast, it seems like I just had her yesterday..

but it seems like my almost 12 year old has been here forver..haha

Dan said...

Happy Bday to her, it sucks how fast they grow

Monogram Queen said...

She is a doll baby! I know she will have a faboo birthday because she has such a faboo Momma!!!!

Tutu said...

I have good news and bad news. The bad is they grow up in the blink of your eye although it seems like forever. The good news is they really are fun when they are adults. They can karoke with you plus they might have kids of their own and then the real fun starts.
Happy Birthday Blondie . . . from this post I can tell your mom is proud of you and adores you.

Rocker_MoM said...

true that!


In a way I can not wait for them to grow up and get the hell outta the house, but then I want them to be little forever and never leave..

it sucks..

Marianne said...

Happy birthday to the little shit. You are right, she is beautiful!

I didn't want kids either. In fact, other people's kids still drive me nuts.

I caught on though and only had one.

Now, Chihuahuas....there's my weakness. I'm up to three. And they are driving me nuts.

And when it dips down below 40 degrees outside, the littlest one won't go outside. She poops in the bathroom.

What was I thinking? Fecal matter is never ending with Chihuahuas. Maybe I should have had another kid.

I hope Blondie loves her rodents! Tell her Texas A & M has a fabulous vet school.

Gig 'em.

Haphazardkat said...

awww. Happy Birthday to your Blonde!!!!
She's gorgeous.

...I say that in a totally uncreepy way :|


Rocker_MoM said...

I had some folks tell me chinchillas are good pets, they never mentioned they were shit machines!

I am not totally convinced that was uncreepy!


Scarlet said...

Sweet post. Your little girl has an awesome smile and the bluest eyes. OMG! Keep her away from Miami!

She's going to love the gift. Every girl between the ages of 8 and 14 wants rodents. Seriously!

You mentioned sperm control (I like that phrase). I need to make an appointment for a permanent solution to that one of these days. I don't want a third, that's for sure!

Happy Birthday to your smartie pants!! :)

So Not The Bradys said...

Happy Birthday to your girl. She's a cutie. You should be proud because she didn't get all sparkly, caring, and compassionate without being raised to be as such. Take some credit, momma. You've done good.

My second boy was born all bruised up too. He looked like he'd gone a few rounds in the ring. His little face was all bruised and his little nose swollen. He had the biggest angel kiss and two stork bites (neck and lower back) for years from his abrupt arrival into the world.

aatank said...

Happy Birthday Blondie!! Hope it's a great celebration. PS. I hope you continue kick your mom's A** at the Wii.

Rocker_MoM said...

yup, i need a permanent fix too or else i could one day be writing about labor pains.

Not the Bradys,
she was born with a birthmark on her forehead, like a red straweberry mark, and she still has it to this day, when she cries it is bright red..Boo has the same thing too...weird.

hey now, u should be rooting for the old lady!..damn..

Neurotic1 said...

Are your sure she's yours. I mean she could've gotten switched at birth and all :) Happy Birthday Blondie...your mom is a nut!

Rocker_MoM said...

u know u love nuts!

raino said...

proud mama. you know, you are not the only one that thinks she is a beauty. i do too.

Cliff said...

When my brother finished Vet school at Missouri U. there were about 2 girls in every graduating class. His son is now finishing vet school in Colorado and he is one of just a couple of men in the class. Times have changed. Your daughter is a cutie. Happy Birthday to her.

Rocker_MoM said...

thanks you!

chicks like animals ya know!..when she was 3 she wanted to be a "heart doctor"..but this farming and vet thing has been a dream now for a while, this one may stick.

Callie said...

Gurl, you must like poo eh? Instead of buying her barbies or bratz you got her more things that poo.. all over...pellets pushers..CLASSIC.

She sure is a beauty. Your a cool mom, my son would just have to deal with Pop rocks and a Coke.



Jamie Dawn said...

Happy Birthday to your middle born child who is truly a beauty, inside and out!!!
She will love her poopie rodents.

JoeinVegas said...

Wow, she is pretty, just like her mom. Same chin and grin.

Rachel said...

She is so pretty! She writes well too!! I hope her birthday is as awesome as she is!!

Rachel said...

Oh, I think she'll love her gift too!! They are cute!

Anonymous said...

Well it could be more'n one. I'm kinda let don you don't remember. Damn ta-kill-ya!