Right here waiting

I figured I would do a real post, I poisoned you enough with my photo vomit and I apologize.

Well while I was away on my "trip" I think I came back carrying about 10 extra pounds. Since I have been home I am not helping the cause much. Unless eating an entire block of pistachio fudge and a half a block of peanut butter fudge are part of a healthy breakfast, I am fine. I feel all fropy . That feeling mostly resembles what I think being a bowl of jello would feel like. Fropy. I just made that up..I am going to copyright it.

A few of my family folk back in the home land told me my sister made remarks about how bossy my Boo Bee is. Yes, she is bossy. This is her daily vocabulary:

faster momma
that's mine
im sick of it
I said no
peeese momma
no momma, I don't wanna do it
stop it now

I would not say she is bossy, just a bit demanding, the girl knows what she wants..Its called being a woman of the 80's people..

Between my bloated fropy body, my sober mind and pre pms hormonal imbalance, during my trip I wanted to knock my sisters block off.

She is the most lazy and irresponsible person I know. When I say lazy, I mean think of the fattest sloth, combine it with your lazy cousin on welfare..(we all have one) then add a dash of Roseanne....That's her..

She weighs a good 250, she has always been chubby or portly if you will. But when her belly roll hangs to her knees and she pats it while lifting up her shirt saying " boy, this baby is really giving me trouble" I want to body slam her. She has no trouble picking her ass, her nose..(and eating it) and has a habit of sitting in a chair with her hands down her pants while yelling four letter curse words at the kids. The whole time while she stayed at my grandparents house she had my grandma do her dirty laundry and cook and do all the dishes...That burns my britches. She has no respect or moral dignity whatsoever. It is very dis heartening. We were not raised that way and she is a total embarrassment. She is my Rodger Clinton or Billy Carter..Or hell she is my George W. Bush..We are not a political family, but I am just making a point..mmkay?

It is hot here. It is the kind of heat that may or maynot melt your face off. Ok, its only in the 90's, but that is with 90% humidity. I love this weather, but everyone is my house is a big fat wuss because they all are complaining about it. When I make my voyage to hell, I hope its a dry heat though, I really hate having sticky skin.

Well I hope everyone has a safe Holiday weekend. Mr Shaky is off for a four day weekend..I hope I don't have to scrape his drunken bum off the deck or out of the bonfire this weekend. That boy cant hold his booze...And I hope he doesn't try and light fireworks while intoxicated, that will just give the neighbors something to talk about...I mean the sirens coming to out the fire out will wake everyone up..

ok, he really does not drink but the story sounded like it had the potential to be a fun one...Now that would be a holiday to remember.

Bee Real