IM too sexy

what's grosser than gross? Not seeing the body of a dead snake but rather its head and torso area. And not a lot of of the torso. Second damn night in a row I saw a dead snake, or parts of a dead snake. I need to find a new path. I need to start walking in Siberia I guess..DAMN!

Have you ever experienced heat so hot you are sure your face is melting like a crayon you left too close to the heat duct? I have not either, but I guess everyone in my house is feeling that way. It is pushing near 100 degrees here, and I tell them " its summer bitches, come on now."

I have to brush up on all the curse words I know. And I am trying to download ones I may have never heard of. I am sure soon I will here terms spew at me that I have no idea of the meaning. In case it may be a complement, I need to know, so I can give the proper props for it. For years I thought fat was bad, but if you spell if phat it means something different. So you can say "sup, bitch, that's phat!"
Now depending on who you say that too it can mean a term of endearment, or you could have your self slapped with a slander suit. How do you know? My best advice is to never use bitch and phat in a sentence unless your talking about your dog in heat or a chubby baby.

I am so not hip to the jargon today. I am not sure what terms these kids on meth are using today. I need to start learning their gang signs. And who thinks up these gang signs? My guess is someone who has not the ability to hold a writing utensil with a proper grip. They are usually sqiggly lines and circles or something foolish. I need to learn the proper hand gestures. I need to be able to greet my pose inmates with the right hand signals. I may be a hip white girl, but I am not up on all this. I am a slacker in this area. I don't like being an outcast, even in the criminal circles.

The truthiness of it all is that I have no damn clue what I am getting myself into. I have dealt with crazies, oldies, uglies, kiddies and whatever else. I may have even had a run in once or twice with a mob boss, I don't know.

Anyway, here is hoping none of them have the ability to read, and have the smarts to look my address up in the phone book and pay me a visit when they are done serving their time in the slammer. This where I hope our school systems have failed.

Is that so wrong?

Bee Real