quick question at the bottom..**
Today is the day...My Blondie Bee loses 2 teeth..And with her summer tan she is looking more and more like blonde headed Mexican.
and I have seen them, and their roots
we are headed off to the petting zoo afterward. Picture this if you will. Blondie Bee with bloody gauze in her mouth, attracting some form of animal who smells blood..They will chase us, they will tackle us, and it will peck both our eyes out...I will be sure to capture portions on film, until my eyes get pecked out..Then it will just be my screams and the dirt and rocks on the ground, some shoes running, and one lonely person saying " should we call 911 or something?"
See what Target has done to me? It has made me have a bad view on a certain race...I was never a bigot before..This is all thanks to Target. But its not all Targets fault. It is partly the weird Mexicans I see faults..I mean they parade around with no teeth, no English, and halatosis, kids not dressed and crapping in the toy ailse...
But I will say this..Today is a new day, for Bossy got a new job. I am still thinking of working one night per week so I can keep my discount, after all I was a Target whore before this whole fiasco happened that turned me sour...Well before I knew they paid less than peanuts.
I will be making 3 bucks more an hour, and I can take my computer to work, so I can still work on my books and download porn if I so wish..
Ok I have a question. You know when the military groups will march they say " hup, two , three four?"...All my life I thought they were saying HUT , two, three , four"..I was enlightened today while watching Who wants to be a millionaire..I have been wrong for over 30 years..There must be some sort of special place in moran jail for me.
Oh and you know what else happened today? Of course you don't, you weren't there. So I will tell you. While I was in for my interview I had my window opened less than half way down, maybe one fourth down...Not a lot...I get back into my mini van to find a bird had shit on my steering wheel...What the hell?..Did a bird spot me on my way in and say " I am gonna squeeze me tiny bird as% in her window and crap all over her steering wheel"
How does this happen? The bird must of actually roamed thru my van, it better not of stole anything...
Mr. Shaky Pants informed me today that he has officially become a man..On this day he is now a man...Why you may ask? Because he bought his first spreader. No not middle age spread, a spreader for the lawn to kill all the grass, I mean weeds...My baby boy is growing up so fast..I may need to catch the moment with Kodak..Moments like this we shan't forget..
Rememebr the girl last summer who my Butch bee was kissing, well the little tramp is back, she was gone all winter...
I am going to revamp my blog roll, get rid of ones I dont read or dont blog anymore, if I read you but your not on my list let me know..I have a bunch I want to add, but have not done it yet..and if any of you read some really funny blogs, let me know..I am looking for some new ones to read..thank you;)
Bee Real
I want to either get a nose ring or another tattoo which would bring me to 6 tattoos..i cant decide which...what do you think?
Posts
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26 comments:
You already know I don't have the choice to shop at Target. Well, I could, if I wanted to drive a long way, which I don't.
The Kisser is Baaaack?!?! Oh, NO!
Hut.. I mean Hup, two, three, four...
Oh, I was supposed to write FIRSTIES!
Because, as we all know, it is an honor to be first to leave a comment.
Why is it an honor? I dunno. It just is.
okay you have a new job..... What the heck is it????? You tell us about the bird crap (which was funny by the way) but leave out your new job?????? come on give it up LOL
jamie,
well, its worth the drive isnt it?..yes the kisser is back, i may go into early menopause after this..
idont know why its a big deal to be first either..but whatever huh..
peggy,
ok yes..I will be working with the mentally Ill and disbalied..dont laugh I am seroius..
Bossy,
We used to have bird crap on the inside lid of our hog feeders. Now did they do flips while they were crapping? How does crap defy gravity? Birds are quite acrobatic when they poop aren't they?
Thanks for pinning yourself to my map!
bav,
what is it with our boys and wanting to kill stuff..man there just weeds...gosh..
and you were added long time ago my friend..LONG time ago..
Best of luck on the new job! I hope you like it.
Nose ring or tat? for me - neither - for you - what the hell go for the nose ring, as long as the new job won't toss a fit.
fanstagirl,
ok what does that mean " for you a nose ring"..what are you trying to tell me?
now you have given me a complex.
but I am leaning towrds that anyway, it will be a heckofalot less painfull..do you think I could pull one off?..not sure I am a big boob, I am not cool and hip..haha
oh my word! ROFL at the bird crap on your steering wheel. the nerve!
Remember, when you grow up you may wish you had never defiled your magnificent temple (your body) with tatoo's. Don't install the nose ring where it can be seen by the general public.
If you lived next door to us, I might consider telling the Grandkids to steer clear of the crazy lady. I'm just sayin.
Good luck with the new job. I'm LMAO about the bird, THAT is just my kind of luck!
Don't delete me yet, I'm certainly not funny but I'm giving the old blog another go! :)
Congrats on the job!!! It takes a special person to work with special people. I can't wait to hear these stories.
My husband prefers weeds that way the kids wear their shoes so they won't step on a picker.
Nose ring or Tat- I love watching Miami Ink...I would go there and get an amazing portrait tat by Cat. She is the best in doing black and white portrait tats.
as I am old enough to be your mom I am going to answer your question like a mom. When you are old and saggy do you want to look at these tattoos on your body everyday? My youngest daughter said yes so I signed years ago for her to get her first tattoo and belly ring. The tattoo was a rose vine over her belly button. She is now married and when she had her 2 babies the vine really grew! She added tattoos and yes even got her nipples pierced. She now wishes she didn't have the tattoos and has let all the piercing grow over except all the ones in her ears. Think really hard and if these are things you will enjoy as you get older and you WILL get older then do it. As for the nose... why would you want to stick your finger in your nose to put the back on or take it off? And what happens when you have a cold and blow your nose? Okay I will hush but listen to your blog mom! LOL
mrs. d,
i thought you would get a kick outta that one!!
cliff,
even if i had no tattos you might want to tell the grandkids the same thing..now just how would i put a nose ring where the genral public cant see it?..answer me this;)
dottie,
your still there..let me know when you get your blog going..i keep forgetting your password and stuff to your new one..i am awful that way..
aatank,
I love Miami Ink too..I am fearful to get a tatto here..I work with lots of girls who have tatoos and they look like crap..all mine are so good, I dont want to taint myself with a yucky looking one..if I do get another one, I might have to wait till I am back at home..I got all mine at this place in Port Huron..not fast freddies but anohter one..they are awsome..
peggy,
nipple rings..holy mother of god, no way!!..all my tattos but one are where i cant even see them, so i wont care much, plus I got my first one when I was like 25...i am 31 now, I am close to being saggy right now..
maybe i should just do the nose ring..I just want a little dainty dimaond stud..thats all:)
Your a trip!
A bird took a shit-ake on your steering wheel? The fuuniest things happen to you girl...
don't get any more tats- get the tiny stud nose ring-no big hoop hanging out of your nose either okay..LOL!
Take care-congrats with new job too!
Why limit yourself, get the tattoo AND the nose ring! You'll totally blow the Preacher's Wife sterotype out of the water! LOL
And about that bird....I bet it was a Mexican bird!
michele,
the damnest things happen to me thats for sure..and trust me, no hoops coming out of my nose, i worry i will snag it on a sweater and rip half my nose off..no thanks!
d,
boy, out of everyone I know I thought for sure you would be all for a nose ring..I dont really know what I would get as a tatto, i was thinking of rosary beads around my ankle and having it end up on the top of my foot..but i already have a tatoo around one ankle so i thought it would be too much, and I cant think of any other body part to toatto..and I cant think of anything to get..my other tats, i knew what i wanted..i have no clue now..
but i will keep thinking..plus a nose ring is less painfull and over in about 10 seconds...am I right!!
annymous,
yes, very true..but like i was telling d, I cant think of anything i want tattoed..i might just have to get the nose ring..but i am gonna think about it;)
What state are you in again?! The Hispanics aren't like that where I live! And at Target??? Nobody goes schlumpy to Target - that's like fancy shopping. ROFL. Walmart, sure, but not Target.
Sorry to hear that little chick is back. Gotta keep an eye on that one!
Not sure about the tatoo or nose ring. What tatoo do you want? Anything in particular?
tee,
well they arent hispanic they are mexican..and yuour right about the walmart thing..they dont know the proper protocoll on how to act and dress while in target..
and with the tats, I dont know..I have 5 already and not sure what else i would get..i need to ponder it.
I would suggest a SMALL diamond nose ring. You're only young once so go for it! Just before I hit the big 3-0, I got my first tattoo and my navel pierced. Didn't make me any younger, but sure didn't make me feel my age either. I love them both!
kelly,
so what is your tattoo of?..and did your navle peircing hurt?..i have thought about that, but maybe after I lose 200 more pounds..haha..i always said when i got to my goal weight i would get a tatto around my belly button..but i dont think i will now..
but the belly button peircing seems to me it would hurt like a SOB..am i right?
I think a partially opened window can act much like a vacuum at times; it started to rain the other day and one rain drop made it all the way through my driver's window (which was only open a few inches) and landed on my right armpit (on the INSIDE of my tee shirt!) It's one of those things you marvel at but have nobody to tell, so thank you for your post which kinda had something to do with my experience. Sort of. Well, a little maybe.
Sorry to hear your little kissey-faced neighbor found her way back to your neighborhood. I don't know what I'll do when faced with those things - ask for your advice I suppose (or just bore them away with stories of strangely aimed raindrops...)
Do you have a belly ring already? I love nose piercings on certain noses; and just a small diamond stud - they can really be classy looking. I think another tatoo is pushing it...?
No pain...no gain, girl! It did, but was over so quickly you hardly had time to scream.. LOL! I am glad I did it!! A tattoo around your belly button? Are you done having kids? Otherwise it will stretch out to be a tattoo of God knows what! I have a purple heart with barbed wire wrapped through it on my ankle. It hurt, but am getting another one this year. I think I may become addicted! :)
You are funny, I'll give you that. Your bees are beautiful. So where is your new job at?
Target lost my faith when they tempted me into applying for a Target card and then wouldn't give me one. Twice they did this... b******s ruining my credit score. We had a job establishing credit because we were incredibly rude forgeiners with tan lines and a dodgey accent.
P.S. I still kind of like to take a butchers at there stuff though. Do you know what butchers means? No I am not going to go and chop anyone up. LOL.
Take care and stop by my blog sometime. I can't say you'll always get a laugh though. Probably way too boring but I try.
Take care
Ok, so I haven't read all the comments here like I usually do. Yes, Bossy, I've been hanging around checking on the progress of your beehive early every a.m. before going to work. Anyway, just read you've got a new job and am soooooo excited for you. This could be the start of something good.
p.s. a spreader, huh. now that's a man!
Me! Me! Blogroll ME! Make me famous!
Love,
The Spelling Nazi Attention Whore
PS Reneck mommy says if you play with your nosering it looks like you're pickin' and grinnin'
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