R.O.C.K. in the USA

Attention..My Ban on Vodka has been officially lift..

Can I get an amen?

Yeah, with the way things have been progressing here in my neck of the woods, it was only a matter of time.

I can safely say that I have suffered no ill effects from not only being dry for so many months, but am feeling not one bit ill the next morning..

Its a win win..

It was a pretty uneventful weekend here at my homestead.

I did some knitting, made some doilies, and some tea cozies...

Saturday Pale girl and I went out to see a live band at a bar on the outskirts of the shitty space I live in..

We have seen this band 3 or 4 times, they rock pretty well, they are just a cover band..and they play lots of rock and roll which gets me on the dance floor like a doctor to the ER with a code blue.

This band always plays the same songs, in the same order, every time..

They always start playing around 9, take a freaking break at 10 resume rocking at 10:30 and take another break at 11:30.

This tends to tick me off a tad. If you can not sustain enough energy to play for more then an hour at a time...go home.

During the various breaks, the drummer would come to my table...Now he only knows me from Myspace has no idea what my name is.

So he sways over during break one and says..

well holy shit, if it isn't rocker mom

Then he proceeds to make deep eye contact and begins to touch my nekkid arm.

Asks me what my real name is, I tell him...

I think he must fancy my name...

We chatted for a bit, and he continues to look deeply into my eyes and touch me.

Don't get me wrong, he is a hottie...but damn, it was kinda weird.

So every time Pale Girl and I hit the floor to dance, he was winking at me, and staring at my mad dance skillz.

I think I have a fan.

We left when they hit break two because frankly, it was boring there.

We went to our local establishment around midnight, to which there was karaoke.

It was not my normal people, but I had been there once before when they were doing it.

I grab a book, turn in two slips, as thats about all the time I had left..

When its my turn she says..

i remember you, and shit your good

yes yes...thats me baby.

I rock out I hate myself for loving you...its what I do.

For the first time in my life people were standing and clapping when I was done..

I was like

seriously what the fuck..a couple screwdrivers in me and I have people bowing to me...

I am looking pretty cute tonight though,cant blame em..


I mean, I was good, but I have been better.

We left after my song, and this very good good looking gent follows us out.

He taps me on my shoulder and I about put a cap in his ass...

cause at midnight, u don't follow chicks out and shoulder tap then without wanting to die.

He told me his buddy was starting a band and he was looking for a female singer and the gig paid a hefty sum...

Asked me if I would be interested..

hmmm...no thanks...

but thanks for the offer pal...

I had never seen him before, so I was not sure if he was just thinking he might be able to sweet talk me into like going in the dark alley and making sweet whoppie with him or not..

So I got in the car, slammed my door, and gave a nice friendly finger wave.

Could of I just potentially blew a gig that would pay me roughly 2,000 every weekend? Plus bonus salary if we played during the week or weddings?

I'm retarded, that's how I roll.