Dream on

So, my weekend that was suppose to be spent in a nice Oceanside hotel, eating nice meals, and holding babies that don't belong to me...Was spent lingering on the sofa, making frequent trips to drain my colon and empty the contents of my stomach.

I spent countless hours laying on my back, complaining of the pain, whilst the kids yell and ask me for me shit, watching endless coverage of dead "celebrities" with talent I can not seem to figure out....And wishing that I had a toilet built into my sofa and my bed.

Then I spent Sunday making valentine boxes and supervising as the bees filled out their valentines cards for school. I had to make sure they hit everyone on the list, because when I was a kid, I was bad. I would intentionally leave valentines out for the kids I thought were ugly or scummy...I know, I am going right to hell.

But come on, I just couldn't bare giving Anna Jacobs or Bob Conners , or Rick Diamond ( he always had some wierd as herpes shit on his face, kinda creeped me out) valentine cards..So sue me...

and dont even tell me u have not done the same thing...there was at least one u "forgot' to give cards too..dont u lie to me..

~
I have a question for the ages...Why when your tiny tot pees herself, u put them right on the toilet?

Boo pissed herelf over the weekend cuz she was to lazy to come upstairs to the john. And what does Mr Shaky do? Puts her ass right on the tiolet..she JUST peed..I mean just now but yet, he sits her there. I am not sure what he was waiting for her to do...I am still perplexed by this practice, I know many of you do it..Your kid pees themselves, and u put them on the tiolet.Sorta like when your training cat, if it shits on the floor, u take its shit to the litter box, put the cat in it so it can smell its own shit inside this box full of gravel...That makes sense to some degree..

But when your dealing with a fully functioning three year old, who knows where her pee pee goes, it baffles the mind a bit...

that's like taking me to the toilet after I just puked all over myself...Makes no sense.

Its kinda like what Boo said to me the other day, she is a very wise baby..

I told her it was too cold to go outside...And you know what she said to me?

"but momma, we can wear coats"

Just like her telling her daddy she already peed when he sits her ass on the john..

daddy, I already went pee pee..See, my pants day are wet daddy

~
So not only did I just waste $350.00 bucks this weekend....But had to be witness to many retarded things..

Like right now I am witnessing my son with his head in a basket that my cat is laying in, and he is letting the cat lick the back of his head..

Who does that?

damn retards, that's who

bee real