Ok, moving on....
I have thought of more gift ideas for ole saint nick. Unless he wants a good kick in the balls, he will oblige to my demands..
* I want him to bring me various pairs of jeans...Nice expensive ones. I want him to buy my size 10's, but I want the tag to say 6..So if anyone looks at my jeans, it will say SIZE 6..Not 10..mmkay...U can sew cant ya Santa?
* I still need that housekeeper..Because holy shit, I have better things to waste time on then cleaning..And if u come here, it will be proven.
* I need a direct line to the people who make 3 Muskateers...And a direct line to the people who run the show NIP/Tuck....Its the best show on TV, yet its only on for 3 months..Does that make any sense to anyone?
* toilet paper. I can never have too much toilet paper.
ok, this concludes this portion of me begging for stuff..
oh, and a violin...I wanted one last year..Never got one..
~
Mr Shaky and I went to dinner last night. Behind us were two women. One woman says to her friend..
" now how often do u feel like stabbing them?"
" if u did hurt them, would you feel bad about it?"
what the hell?
Then the lady said to her again..." Do u need help controlling your anger?..Try listening to music"
So when they left, I made sure to look at them both...I have a feelin they will be visiting the county motel in the near future...
~
My son is barfing today........
My Boo had green poop and insisted on me looking at it with her....Then asking me if I thought it was pretty.
My Blondie is wanting to show me her fancy wrestling moves..But I am afraid she will kick my ass..
Mr Shaky is asking me " so, what did u get done with the house today?"
I tell him..Look around..
nothing asswipe..
Bee Real
Wednesday, December 06, 2006
I got the fire baby, u got the heat can u handle it
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24 comments:
I love the honesty. I say the same thing to Mr. Conservative. Why do they feel the need to ask such stupid questions? Mr. Conservative actually suggested we have a cleaning service come. My comment was that I would need something to do when they were here because I didn't want to see the looks on their faces when they came to scrub my commodes!
a violin??? that is too funny. i am sorry but i so can't see you playing that at all!! drums, bass but not violin! hope boo gets better soon! if santa brings you the housekeeper can you send him/her my way. too damn tired to do my own house and hubby isn't helping out since my sift changed.
Neuortic,
yes,, I wouldnt want to have to look the cleaners who clean my pots and my showes in the eye...it would be to embarassing..
1 plus twins,
yup..always wanted to learn how to play the violin..in fact in my x-mas post last year I stated i was going to learn to play before theyear ened..times up I guess..damnit.
My house is always a mess. I need a little elf that lives on dust-bunnies and cleans like Mary Freakin' Poppins. Hope St. Nick brings you what you want.
Hope you don't get the barfs or green poop. That would suck.
why not ask him for money and you can just buy everything you need yourself to make sure you get it right! And I am shocked! you didn't take a picture of the green poop???? ROFLMAO
Blazer,
geesh, I love dust bunnies, its the kitty food on the floor and the juice stain on my carpet i am not so fond of;)
Peggy,
holy crap, I was so gonna do it..but thought it might be too gross:)..but u know me too well peggy, thats scarey:)
Hope the kids get to feeling better soon and you dont get whatever they have!!
Yeah--I would be on the look out for those women! Yikes.
Hope your kids feel better soon.
Its always odd what you over hear people talking about!
Oh I want a cleaner too Santa if your reading this!
I love my dust bunnies, I named them all.
The best ones are the ones covered with dog fur.
A violin...how nice. :)
I don't think I asked for much this year...oh yeah...I DO want the entire collection of "Friends" on dvd. :)
Maybe Santa will bring it to me!
And Scott took me and chose a new pair of glasses...I'm going to look so hot and trendy. LOL
Kendra
Brandy,
Butch was up puking his guts out all night..I got no sleep...will u come sew me some socks please?
Marel,
I got my eye out, trust me;)
Hails,
I know I hear the gooffiest shit..
Deni,
ya want mine then?..haha
Kendra,
yup, always wanted to learn how to play the violin..I hate friends, but I know lots of people do like it...I am fussy when it comes to sitcomes, for good reason:)
if mr shakey values his nards...he won't ask that question ever again. who raised that boy.
why do boys insist on making us look at their crap? i get called in to examine feces on a routine basis. i'm going to get an honorary degree in crap analyzing.
Suzie,
well, its my Boo who wants me to look at her crap...not my Boy..I would expect it from him...but this baby is one of a kind...I have seen more crap and vomit in the last 24 hours then I canre to think about.,
"oh, and a violin...I wanted one last year..Never got one.."
I have a violin. I never practice anymore and it collects dust in the closet but I'm selfish and not sending it you.
Yes, I am that evil.
You can find a relatively cheap violin at http://www.musiciansfriend.com/ or on eBay. That information is for Mr. Shaky Claus. Poke him with a stick if he doesn't get it.
I should get my ass in gear and start practicing again.
As to Mr. Shaky's query regarding house cleaning, I suggest you either refer him to www.merrymaids.com or the vacuum cleaner and toilet bowl cleaner. Whichever is cheaper and apt to get the job done.
lol at the green poo..oh the joy of being a mom and a wife! i would of given those women a look too, i mean if they're talking about their husbands fine, but kids? wtf?
Girl, buy jeans that size by inches and then you'll never know what your size is. It's fabulous.
What? You don't clean in your spare time? Me neither...my rampant dust bunnies are proof positive of that.
Laura,
what kind of frined teases you with a violin...a bad one, thats what kind..
I will never get one, i dont even know how to play one:)
vani,
yes I over hear some weird shit...I dont know who they were talking about,, i think the older woman was the younger gals " therpaist" or something..
TKW,
do they make them in inches?...but hell it be a bigger number wouldnt it?..I dont want a bigger numebr..good God woman.
When I was in highschool there were these jeans made by Bongo. If you normally wore a size 10 in their jeans you would wear a 5 it was great. I think you should see if they still make them. Sorry Butch is puking that makes for a bad day for all around. Good luck with your Christmas wishes.
So sorry he kept you up all nite! Its been a long time since I have had to deal with that stuff. They sort of grow out of it as they get older.
Sure I will come make ya some socks. I need a damn vacation anyways! I would be even willing to bring the teen and make her do the cleaning and babysitting! heheeh
I wrote a letter to santa and included you in my list. Hope you get what I asked for. LOL
Bossy,
Does Mr. Shaky Pants wear a protective cup when he asks those questions?
OMGSH! Nip/Tuck f***ing rocks! I love it!
I hear you about the jeans too!!!!!!
xoxo
haaaaa
haaaaaaaa
mr shakeybritches is brave!
that would have started a 20 minute throw down at my house!
have you ever seen a woman go batshit crazy?
thats what woulda happened if ida asked her that!
green poop?
you must not be feeding her like a human, feed the child some meat!
js
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